Work the Plan

Break a Toe

2008-05-27T13:45:00.002-04:00

I don't have a lot exciting to say -- only that I broke my toe this morning on a chair in the hotel. It has turned a lovely shade of black.

The only other point of interest today was the conversation Coby had at lunch today where he was trying to get a plain hamburger at the Burger King. He had mastered the technique in many languages, but had yet to learn the German version.

In French -- au naturel...
In Spanish -- se nada...
In English -- just the meat and bun and don't make me come over there.

In German, it was much more difficult. We spent the entire car ride over there in a "Who's on First?" scenaraio.

Coby: How you order a burger with just the meat and bun
Friend: So you want it medium? (say meat and bun out loud, it sounds like medium)
Coby: Yes, that is right, just meat and bun
Friend: Well, I guess you could just say "Medium" for the cooking. I have never ordered it this way...
Me (figuring out what is going on): So to say "No Lettuce, no tomato, no sauce, etc..." we would say "Medium"?
Friend: Oh, so you just want the burger?
Coby: Yes -- and the bun
Friend: And the Cheese?
Coby: No, just the meat and the bread
Friend: What about the sauce?
Coby: No, no sauce
Friend: Really -- no sauce, no cheese?
Coby: Yes, I am picky
Friend (in good German manner): But they will still charge you for it
Coby: I know, I just want the meat and the bun
Friend: I don't know if you can order it this way
Coby: No, I know I can -- I may just need your help.

Coby: Guten Tag! Sprechen sie Anglische? (Hi, do you speak English?)
BK Fraulein: Nein
Coby: Um, Help
Friend: (In German): He only wants the burger and the meat

...long conversation which is a repeat of the above...

Friend: So I guess you would say to them "Plain"

Autobahn Driving

2008-05-25T11:30:00.000-04:00

Saturday we slept in. I read and worked a bit -- and then Coby came to pick me up to head to Frankfurt. He got kicked out of his room before he could finish our production updates -- so we had to get him an internet connection.
- Hotel no connection (I could, he could not)
- Standing outside the office trying to get wireless -- no joy
- Hotel next door (I could, he could not)
- Paying a big fee two hours later... finally

Anyway, our plans to leave at 11 were delayed a tad to 5 p.m... We had about 5 1/2 hours to go so after dinner at -- you guessed it -- McDonald's... Tom Tom led us north.

The trip was a little slow (we are sure we got two speeding tickets) until we got to Germany and the speed limit was eliminated. I learned a few things
1) The top speed of our brand new Hyundai is 190km (roughly 120mph)
2) The autobahn will suddenly insert speed limits near interchanges of 80km (roughly 50mph)
3) Needing to adjust from 190km to 80km in a short span is very good at keeping the car passengers awake.

Coby drove. I held on tightly to the appropriately titled handle.

We got to the hotel around 10:30 and went for dinner (at a kabab stand, no less) around midnight.

Sunday -- met at 1:30 for lunch at Subway, walked around a bit and then back to work... It is an exciting life we lead.

Geneva Again

2008-05-25T11:16:00.001-04:00

Thursday
I started the morning with the light version of the British breakfast. It was only one piece of bacon, one sausage, one tomato, one poached egg, 4 pieces of toast with homemade jam, one bowl of fruit salad, one glass of orange juice, and finally one pot of tea. The full version was double that, and again I wonder about the comments about American portions.

I then had to get some help getting out of my chair with a crowbar, a jack and a crane -- but arranged for a late checkout so that I could digest the food, handle my conference calls, and finalize the packing for my 11:15 pickup.

The hosts offered to carry down my bags, but this was cleverly disguished as meaning that "Our stairs are narrow and you have a big bag and we do not want you marking up our walls" but I said I was fine. I even offered to drop my luggage out the window and carry my clothes down t-shrit by t-shirt if it made them more comfortable. However, some people don't get my humor. Sigh.

I was then off to Heathrow Terminal 5 which is very very nice. I had lunch at a British restaurant (Ploughman's lunch which is really cheese, fruit, bread and ham) and then flew to Geneva. I checked into the hotel and wandered over the office to say a couple of "Hellos". I then went with Stevie and his Dad to see the Celtics win the Scottish Premiere League.

Friday
Friday was normally work, training, and meetings. We went out for a late dinner after our next set of Go Live activities. About 8 of us went out for pizza and it was good to see everyone -- and hear about my friend Nicolas trip to America where the dollar is cheap and the steaks are plentiful.

Work Work Work

2008-05-21T16:45:00.000-04:00

I did the whole work thing. It is really getting in the way of my travels.

The office is in an old English Country house -- and by old, I mean only about 400 years.

The lawn and gardens are well tended and completely over run by rabbits. Literally about 40-50 rabbits frolick about on the lawn. It should be noted that the rabbits seemed to be everywhere but on the cafeteria menu, despite my several requests.

I went out for a couple fo meals for dinner. It is always a bit odd to go by yourself. I try to read a bit during dinner, but I have 6 1/2 weeks to go and I have already finished 2 of 3 books. Poor planning on my part.

Tonight I went to Hotel du Vin based on a recommendation from a colleague. It was really good. I had a warm snail and mushroom salad, roasted pork belly with apple and porcini jus -- and then a chocolate/orange mousse. Last night was dinner with the country controllers -- chicken liver parfait, beetroot & wensleydale risotto and then a sticky toffee pudding with butterscotch sauce.

The night before, in honor of Coby, I had a burger. Granted it was a lamb curry burger, but a burger just the same. No McDonald's in sight. For dessert I had a chilled Grand Marnier souffle that just was unspeakably delicious. Sigh.

Tomorrow I head off to Geneva. I am going to work from the hotel here before I fly out in the afternoon. Tomorrow night I am supposed to go watch Chelsea play at an English pub with my Scottish friends.

British Checklist

2008-05-19T17:06:00.000-04:00

I arrived in the very green and very beautiful Henley on the Thames. This is English countryside at the finest.

I go into the bed and breakfast -- the Falaise House, very nice. I am welcomed (by name) by the hostess and given a choice of rooms. I take the one with the shower versus the bath -- and she keeps suggesting the bigger room given the size of my one suitcase. She keeps calling me "My Love" and "My Dear" -- and I am feeling very British.

So, off I go to be British.

Item 1: Food
I wander over to find a pub. The issue seems to be not to find a pub, but to figure out which one to go to... My driver had explained the differences between pubs and free houses, but didn't have one to suggest. Therefore, without anything better to go on, I went to the Argyle pub because while I knew nothing about their food -- they make good socks.

I sat at the table patiently, which is a bit troublesome when you are traveling alone as I feel like I am a stalker in training. You just can't help but watch people and also feel like they are watching you. The waiter finally notices me and let's me know that you order at the bar. Ah...

I order the fish and chips because that is what you do. It came with peas. Check

Item 2: Ale
Room Temperature. Check. Non-carbonated. Check.

Item 3: Tea
I wandered around downtown and saw that the local church was offereing tea. I stopped by and chose a little cake (a heavy orange cake with raisins and cherries) and tea. I was not sure how much a "spot of tea" was so I had two cups.

So within 4 hours of landing -- I think that I have done it all.

I did attend a choir event at the church which was only built in 1204. I misread the event and actually attended Catholic mass. Unintentional, but if anyone in the family is reading this, please tell my mother I went to church this Sunday.

I was having trouble keeping awake after the time change, but a Catholic mass never lets you sit, stand or kneel long enough to fall asleep.

I went to bed at a very late 8 p.m.

First Class

2008-05-19T16:43:00.000-04:00

I definitely have a philosophy about dealing with the service professionals. I watch in amazement as countless people demean the people working the typically lesser paid jobs while at the same time they demand favors. I have a former boss that says that he can tell everything he needs to know about someone by the way that they play golf. He can tell how they handle stress, how they recover from a bad situation, how they reason and how well they carry themselves with others. I say, give me an evening at a restaurant or let me fly with someone -- and I can tell within a few minutes whether or not you are a good person.

This philosophy carries over to flying. I have a few things I always do...
1) I always dress up a little bit. Not that I am trying to be pretentious -- everyone knows that without my wife I would have zero fashion sense -- I just want to look like I care.
2) I always smile and try to chat up the airline staff. If they are busy or don't want to chat, I accept that.
3) I always help any older person, woman or child get things situated when they obviously need a bit of help.
4) I try to relax and forget the stress. Typically more so than I can do anywhere else as for some zen reason, I seem to simply accept that I will get where I am going within a day or so of my intended time within a suitcase or so of what I started with... I am always caring a mobile phone, passport, credit card and laptop. Anything or anyone else can be purchased, called, or emailed.

So I get to Atlanta for the long layover. I am patient with the waitstaff at Fridays after an hour or so of waiting on my Diet Coke. (Don't ask for any Pepsi product in Atlanta, you get a lecture.) I patiently relax in the airline gate waiting area.

I look at my ticket and I realize that I have the worst of the worst... I am in a middle seat of the middle section. I am guaranteed to get zero sleep. So I walk over the the desk and say politely that I just noticed that I am in a middle seat, I understand that they are busy but if anything opens up anywhere else on the plane that I would definitely consider it a personal favor if they could help me.

The British guy looks at the ticket, recognizes my name as a former general and says he would do what he can, but looks very doubtful. I thank him and tell him that I completely understand. I wish him luck with all the demanding people in line -- and tell him that all Americans aren't this annoying, just all the people in this particular line...

5 minutes pass and my name is called. Aisle seat
5 minutes more pass and my name is called and suddenly I am in first class
5 minutes more pass and my name is called again -- uh oh, thinking my first class assignment was temporary, but no -- he is giving me a better first class seat.

The funny part about it too was that a woman cut in front of me to board the plane. She was rude and giving the woman a hard time about the ticketing process. She, of course, boarded in front of me (I am never really in a hurry to get into a seat that will be conforming to my butt for 8 hours) and then was horrified that I was sitting next to her... and she apologized for several minutes... Ah Karma.

I arrived at Heathrow very rested, got my luggage and met my driver at the exit. I put my luggage in the "boot" and walked around to get into the passenger side. Of course, when I opened the door to the British car, the "passenger" seat came equipped with a steering wheel, gas pedal and full controls. A nice British voice spoke very matter of factly and said, "If it is all well with you, I will do the driving".

Crikey.

Glamorous Lifestyle

2008-04-13T06:43:00.000-04:00

We got a suite this time as that gives us a kitchen, two bedrooms, living room and bath.

I wake up about 7:15, shower and start going through email. We leave for the office about 8:30 pass customs and get to the office just before 9. I usually go to my first set of meetings or teach our classes until 12 and then we break for lunch. Most days meetings do not start again until 2, so I can do a little more prep/email before we get started again. Meetings wrap up in Europe by 6 and usually I only have calls back with the US a couple nights a week. We do email and work for the next day and leave the office by 8 or 9.

Generally, we head back to the apartment, I eat a couple granola bars and jump back on to do email/work until about 10:30. A couple nights a week we go out with friends -- generally that is a later in the week proposition. Yesterday, we worked most of the day and then went out for dinner (Mexican) with our Scottish friends. Today, we are working this morning and are supposed to go to dinner (Fondue) with our German friends in town from the Phillipines. Next weekend there is no "go live" and my architect is leaving for the US. I am going to try to do something fun.

The odd part is that on Friday we finalized our training plan for our country rollouts -- which led to the fact that this is my last trip to Geneva. That is kind of bittersweet. I am happy for it to be over, but I am going to miss a few good friends I have made. It feels a bit rushed.

Ah, well -- back to work.

Typical Trip

2008-04-12T09:19:00.000-04:00

These trips are starting to get to be a bit routine. I have a bit of a pattern that I go through -- I don't know if it is all the OCD working itself out or simply the comfort of going with what works.

Packing
I really do hate to pack, which is odd, since Nicole does all of the laundry which means I have the monumental task of putting things in a traveling box instead of a stationary closet. It really shouldn't be that hard. It is all really based on a combination of proscratination and a fear that I won't have something that I "need".

Fear 1: I will forget something. This is completely unfounded since as long as I have the three essentials, there really is no problem (passport, credit card, unbacked up laptop with all of my work).
Fear 2: That there will be some activity for which I will not have some essential item. Every trip so far to Geneva (except my summer trips), I have brought clothes to ski. This trip I did not and we are supposed to go ski tomorrow. I have suits and work clothes. I have the clothes to go out nights/weekends. I have exercise clothes -- which I have determined just take up space and I no longer bring, I have given up the dream of rock-hard-travel-abs. Sigh.
Fear 3: I will be made fun of... for my BFS. My primary travel suitcase is a pretty good size. Unfortunately, it is dwarfed by the even bigger suitcase I bring along with it. Luckily, I always reserve an automatic car which doesn't come in "Mini Cooper."

The packing starts about two weeks in advance where I start compiling a list of the things I need to bring with me for others -- and the books/DVDs I want to bring. This time I went with the nice calm wholesome All-American Dexter, season 1. In Europe, if you prefer to understand what you are watching you have the choice of CNN, BBC World or Sky News.

I first start emptying my work backpack of all the random things that seem to hide in there. I realized I was carrying about 4 pounds of change in various currencies, apparently for exercise. In the front pocket I put a pen (for visa entry/exit), my travel toothbrush and a travel container of Advil -- organized left to right. In the zipper pocket above goes my laptop headphones. In the pouch on my left go my mobile phones and security badge -- the pocket on the right holds mints and watch until I get through security. In the second compartment I put cough drops (airplane dryness) and granola bars. In the third compartment goes (in order) noise cancellation headphones (left), power convertor & cord on the right -- then book for plane on side with pages facing down on the left and the DVDs on the right and I top it with a travel pillow. This leaves room in this pocket for the two bottles of Diet Coke I will grab for the plane once I pass through security. The last pocket gets my laptop and two magazines with the laptop nearest my back. On top of the laptop is a ziplock bag with toothpaste and mouthwash for the plane.

My other carry-on gets a change of clothes for the way over -- chocolate on the way back. (They have only misplaced my luggage twice and both times it was when I didn't pack the carry-on bag.)The other bags get packed normally at the last minute. The only additional thing that I do is try to pack the batteries next to the liquids (Pepto and Nyquil) with cables running near them. Oddly, this bag ends up getting opened every single time.

Actual Travel
I try to get to the airport two hours early even though I only need about 10 minutes to get to the plane. Frequent travels scoff at this concept -- but they just cannot comprehend the inner peace that I get when I am where I am supposed to be without stress. The guy with whom I do most of the travel seems to start every story with "So we were an hour from the airport..." and ends with "...but we just made the plane."

In Lexington, the security takes no time at all as everything is pretty well organized to get out and through the x-ray machine. This time I was frisked my a nice old guy who was very polite. I had switched flights to later in the day, so I was flagged. I sit in the Bourbon Bar, put my watch back on, and start my book while I savor one of the last Diet Cokes that I will drink that has enough ice in it to actually make a difference.

On the first flight to Cincinnati, I get in my seat with one of the diet Coke bottles in the seat pocket. I start to read, but as I am usually in the exit row, I always interrupted by the flight attendant looking at my huge muscles and then looking concerned and trying to confirm that I would be okay getting the door open in the event of an emergency. Since I have learned that flipping her the bird does not get you the extra bag of peanuts, I smile and nod enthusiastically.

I read until the plane starts to take off and I then watch Lexington fade away beneath the plane. After a deep sleep of 35 minutes, we arrive in Cincinnati for me to switch terminals by bus and get over to Max & Ermas or Wolfgang Pucks (Terminal B) for what really will be my last Diet Coke with ice.

Before we board, I try to scout out the biggest human being in the terminal and place odds on them sitting next to me. They seem to be very good.

We get on the plane. I place the two bottles of soda, my book and headphones in the seat pocket. The backpack under the seat in front and the carry on above. Travel pillow is set. I reset my watch to Geneva time and move it from my left arm to my right -- as I sleep with my arms crossed and my left arm is always under.

Nine long hours later we arrive in Paris and I usually have only slept for a couple of hours. I switch terminals -- which requires leaving and coming back through customs, security, etc... I buy a new (warm dang it) Diet Coke a ridiculous sum and fall asleep at the gate. I board the last crowded flight to Geneva, get through border control, baggage claim and security -- rent the car and head to the hotel.

Florence and all the naked guys

2007-12-04T17:19:00.000-05:00

We took our 2 hour drive to Tuscany (Beautiful) arriving in Florence around lunch.

We talked to the hotel desk guys and he told us to take the 23 bus (23A coming home) downtown as parking would be too difficult. I concur.

We ride the bus and take in the sites including the statue of David. We didn't realize that it was about 20 feet tall -- and really was done so perfectly that you almost expected to see it breathe. Impressive.

Lunch -- Nicole goes crazy and gets spaghetti. I try to get something completely different and get spaghetti carbonara (awesome).

Snack -- Gelato (Nicole Vanilla, Matt Panna Cotta)

Dinner -- Nicole, Eggplant something something and Matt gets a leek and sausage rissoto. We finish with a berry and fruit of the forest yogurt (Nicole) and Matt gets a locally produced dark chocolate mousse which came with a realistic looking gellied pear mustard. I can't make that up.

Parma -- trust the TomTom

2007-12-04T17:14:00.000-05:00

Monday - we did get a bit of a late start as we had to get 75% of our luggage from the airport. We took the five hour drive through France/Italy/Mont Blanc tunnel to get to Parma. We did get stopped at the Italian border for papers for about 1/2 hour, but didn't even get our passports stamped.

Our TomTom passed the test. It took us through some sketchy areas directly to the hotel. Marriage saved.

Dinner was wonderful. Appetizer of Parma Ham and Parmesan cheese. Nicole had breat of pheasant with a juniper berry gravy. I had sweet local sausage with potatos. She had a parfait for dessert. I had an egg nog custard that Rocked.

Not a bad start. Nicole has agreed to stay.

This sucks and I want to go home

2007-12-03T16:33:00.000-05:00

So Nicole and I left for Europe on Saturday. Our flight didn't take off until 6, so it was a pretty easy day laying around, waiting to go to the airport -- or it would have been if we hadn't waited to pack until around oh, 3.

First flight
No issues. It was, after all, on the highly touted "Chataqua Airlines".

Second flight
Well, to be fair -- this was the big one -- Cincinnati to Paris, and it was Delta, so it had a bit more room for error. It started nicely. We boarded on time and taxied out to the runaway. An then the pilot announced that there was a "slight mechanical error". We thought that it was just that none of the reading lights worked (because they didn't) or that the planned movie didn't work (because it didn't). However it was that the number 2 engine wouldn't start. They had to fly a part up from Atlanta. So while 3 1/2 hour delays is unwelcome -- I did prefer to have the requisite number of working engines on my planes. I was also willing to let them take off and come back -- shake the bugs out -- before I got back on.

Unfortunately, there are a limited number of international flights on Saturday nights and so the Cincinnati terminal was closed. We were given the option of getting off the plane, but there were no restaurants open and we could not leave the immediate area. Or we could sit on the plane for three hours, watching, well listening, to a bad movie that kept sparking in and out -- for 3 1/2 hours before we took off.

Third flight
We were moved to a new flight to Geneva. No worries. I used the self-service kiosk instead of standing in line to talk to an Air France person to argue the same topic. Unfortunately, those that stood in line got baggage in Geneva. Those that used the self-service kiosk did not.

No bags
So luggageless we went to the hotel about 1/2 hour before my friends came to pick us up for a great fondue at their place. Great time...

Back to the hotel -- not so great time. No luggage. (I would later drive to the airport to pick it up the next morning -- as they had three of our bags, but were waiting to call on the 4th bag that was in Warsaw, Poland -- luckily this was our gift and not our clothing bag).

We slept in what we wore for the last 48 hours. Or we laid in bed and I tried to fall asleep to the gentle hum of Nicole (who had not slept on any of the flights) saying ever so sweetly "This sucks. Let's go home".

I did what she does when I try to hit on her.

I rolled over and pretended to be asleep.

Stupid Yummy Decadent Apple Caramel Cheesecake

2007-10-03T18:26:00.000-04:00

Well, contrary to the implication of the title, I won out of about a dozen entries. Or at least I tied for first. We both had 36 points and from what I understand, I won presentation and Shauna won for taste. Not that it was rigged, but Shauna is Co-Chair for the Campaign and I am in charge of canvassers.

It was also a little uncomfortable in our leadership meeting where she and I, and then one other contestant were in the room when the results were announced. The other woman (and her recipe was GOOD) didn't place. I am just sorry I didn't get to be a judge. Immediately, someone suggested that we have another challenge, I guess it would be a bake off off. So I challenged her to an Iron Chef competition in the cafeteria. We will see...

Also, as confident as I was going in, I really didn't prepare well. I had all the preparation down leading to the event -- towels in the car to level the carrier, knives and extras to do any repairs on-site, focused look for the game face -- you know what I mean. What I didn't have down was my bake off touchdown dance. I just have never seen a white guy pull off a baking victory dance. Checking my favorite cookbooks, Alton Brown doesn't mention it a single time.

Also, it is a bit hard to talk about it with your friends at work. Sure, fantasy football stats roll off the tongue -- but talk about the challenges of using a non-circular spring form pan and they look at you like you just, well, hit on them. Sad. I mean really, if you can't talk to your closest male colleagues about whether or not mixing lemon and orange zest is better than using lemon zest alone -- who can you talk to?

Sometimes I just feel so alone.

Bake Off is On

2007-10-02T22:24:00.000-04:00

I entered into a bake off. It was a good cause and as a member of the leadership team, I thought it might be a good example to participate. Really, I mean that my winning cheesecake would be a good example of the winning dessert -- but if it helps someone be motivated to do better, then, well that is just icing on the cake.

I am doing a cheesecake and I am cheating. Not because I bought it, brought in Bobby Flay or have somehow accidently tripped a competitor -- but my cheesecake recipe has a fatal flaw that I am covering up.

See, I used to bake them all the time and they were beautiful. That was until Nicole forced us to move out of our first apartment into a house. The oven at the apartment was perfect -- not that I have any idea why -- just that every cheesecake came out beautiful. In House 1.0, every cheesecake came out with a crack. In my first attempt at House 2.0, minor, but still cracked. Normally, I just go ahead and cut pieces and no one knows. This competition is all about presentation and taste. Taste I can win. Presentation, well, unless we are in a Grand Canyon themed event, not so much.

So, I am cheating and I added a pastry cream to fill in the gaps and then cover it with raspberries and white chocolate. The pastry creme is very oddly the EXACT same color as the cheesecake. Coincidence? Well, yes -- but still pretty cool.

If I don't post for a while, it means I was robbed. If you are a judge and reading this, bribes are negotiable.

Um, I am unique, just like everyone else

2007-09-25T20:55:00.000-04:00

My wife got my on facebook. Kinda fun, you can find people, get back in touch -- that sort of thing. Then I was told to search groups by my sister in law for my name. Tonight I found three groups:
1) We are Matt... with my full name
2) We love Matt... with my full name
3) We hate Matt... with my full name

I must admit my first reaction was to go into the third group to look for any ex-girlfriends or kids on whom some practical jokes might have gotten out of hand. Luckily the last two groups were only done for one guy in particular and it wasn't me.

The first group though, was "invitation only". I did request membership and I am sure that someone, somewhere is checking my credentials with all the scrutiny that a prestigious facebook group would require.

I just hope I make the cut.

About 1/2 my life...

2007-09-18T21:43:00.000-04:00

I like math. I mean that in a statistical sort of way (or at least 9 times out of 10 I do). I like to measure, mix, match and meander through the numbers to sort of organize my life and thoughts and better understand the depth/breadth of an idea.

For example, today I started the process of recovering a buried treasure lost at sea over ten years ago... a friendship started my freshman year of college in 1990. I am 35 and that friendship started almost half my life ago. Excited about it, I called two friends from the same era (you get my age and there are eras) also from 17+ years ago. Bizarre. I know it is a cliche, but you don't get to choose your family -- but I do believe that everyone else chooses on a daily basis whether or not to stay in any type of relationship. I am glad this one is back.

After work, Nicole and I went for a walk today through the neighboorhood park and talked a lot about who we are, were and plan to be. Funny how taking a step back makes the path forward a bit more clear. I wouldn't go back 18 years, but I am definitely glad a few folks have come along these couple of decades with me...

Back in Black (& White)

2007-09-16T20:49:00.000-04:00

I keep getting hounded about keeping this thing up to date. It is harder than I thought it would be, although failing to every keep a diary despite the annual New Year's resolution to do so -- I should have known better. I am struggling to get a couple of trips together. It is unclear if I am headed back to Geneva in October/November, although we have to go back in December. I figure that I should just count on that trip and forget the rest.

Right now we are gearing up for a few folks (about 50) to head our way instead. Nicole's brother is getting married next weekend and we are throwing the rehearsal dinner. Nicole had originally thought we would do it at our house -- but after a long discussion explaining that our oven did not the magically properties of Harry-Potter-land, she caved and let us set it up at a clubhouse with a bit of catering.

The trip I would much rather be planning is the one where my friends Larry and Tria are at this very moment. Sure -- I took them to Glacier a couple of years... Yet on their three week adventure in Alaska I wasn't even there for a single one of their 14 (in week 1) bear sightings. Sigh.

I do have a trip down to Houston and a canoe trip in October. It just isn't the same.

All God’s Creatures Great and Small…

2007-07-05T12:50:00.000-04:00

… are really tasty grilled with a side of au gratin potatoes.

Wednesday
I got to try a new animal tonight. A “Spring Boch (something or other) antelope from South Africa. It was a tough call over kangaroo and other meats, but I figured my chances were pretty slim that I would get it again.

Xaviere took us out to a winery and then to a restaurant where you order food which comes out sizzling on a very hot piece of slate so that you can cook to your liking. As this is fine dining, they give you a paper bib that looks like you have on a tuxedo shirt. Classy. The antelope was good – very tender. However the potatoes were so creamy, like my mother’s grandmother and great aunt used to make. (I throw that in for reference as I know that NOW you really know what they taste like.) The difference is that the Swiss don’t seem to be concerned with using super heavy cream and cheese in anything – sort of to the same level where we feel comfortable with salsa.

Xaviere also called her husband and is going to rescue me from the itty bitty hotel in the middle of my stay. I really appreciate it. It is always a bit stressing to be with work people all the time, but after a while – these are definitely friends and not just work people. Life is better.

Thursday
Tonight we are going to be taken out to another cheese place. I really do appreciate it when people take us out. My only complaint is that I think I am about one fondue away from not being able to see my toes. To be continued…

Is this really necessary?

2007-07-04T12:12:00.000-04:00

So I "volunteered" to stay another week. By volunteered, I mean that there were three of us in the room who all agreed that that we needed another week to bring closure to this phase of our efforts. I agreed. The three of us all discussed what need to be covered. I agreed. The three of us talked about the roles, challenges and opportunities that needed to be mastered. I agreed. Then suddenly the two people who I shouldn't have to say -- report to me on this effort -- had very good excuses to be other places and I was stuck with the extra week.

Not too bad... I am showing leadership, taking one the for the team -- doing this for the good of the project. Then the hotel situation came up. This went from a necessary evil to, and I quote the Princess Bride here... "Inconceivable".

It started where I couldn't extend my current hotel another week. Not too bad as I had already completed my graffeti masterpiece on these jail cell walls and was ready for a new tapestry. Then the hotel where our office is located was full -- okay, it was rather expensive. Then all of the hotels within walking distance... Not too bad as I have a car. Then the nearest hotel available for all nights was just a mere 153 miles away in Neuchatel -- and it was a smoking room.

Now I am normally not really picky about my rooms -- generally. Clean. Safe. Private. However, I didn't realize some of the options that were out there. Regardless we were working feverishly to get the best possible situation for me -- and from all the travel agents, travel coordinators and just helpful locals that I talked with, we did everything that we could. I really appreciate it. Apparently there are multiple conventions in town so the following options were chosen over the refridgerator box in an alley. So this is where I ended up...

Sat/Sun -- Low Budget Hotel (normal, private room) No worries.

Mon/Tues -- a room that advertises the following amenities (and I can't even make this up)
"Our rooms are modern and cleverly designed. They contain a double bed and a bunk, a washbasin and mirror, a corner table, a TV for viewing national channels"
Please note what is missing from that list... washbasin.... No private toilet. No private shower... This is summer camp. Here is a link and be sure to take the virtual tour of the room. My favorite part is that a human being only works there a few hours a day -- the other times you access the room/check-in by swiping a credit card. http://www.hotelformule1.com/formule1/gb/decouvrez/hotels/chambre.shtml At least it is only about $40USD/night.

Wed/Thurs
Movenpick -- expensive hotel where the office is located. Very nice. Will probably enjoy shower and de-lice.

Friday
Most likely spent sleeping in Paris airport I only have 45 minutes to get across the airport and through customs to make my flight to New York.

Saturday
MY BED. Well, Nicole's bed but she gives me about 1/4 of one side.

4th of July

2007-07-04T01:50:00.000-04:00

Being in Europe, the fourth of July has a slightly different significance. It is required to come immediately before the 5th of July otherwise calendars everywhere would be messed up.

We did think that we would get to do the fireworks celebration thing. Apparently there are about 40,000 ex-pats here in Geneva. However, it is cancelled this year (no reason supplied). Instead, we went with option 2. We are going in to work. I am trying to talk everyone into seeing a movie later. Something intensely patriotic like Die Hard 4.

I only speak a little French

2007-07-03T02:55:00.000-04:00

My french is improving. I would compare my growth to the speed of an advancing glacier (typically 1 cm an hour). While not Berlitz speedy, it is moving forward. Where I really am lacking is in the speed.

We went to McDonalds again, because, well that is what we do. I stare at the menu. I focus my language skills. I am ready with my order -- a burger on french bread and emmenthal cheese (not bad) combo meal. I step up to order and am bombarded with a series of questions.

(Translated from French)

Hello sir how are you and how can I help you today will that be for here or to go and what size and what drink with that and do you want fries or potatoes and how about a donut or an ice cream okay that will be 18.50.

To picture me, imagine that you have just been asked the most complex question in the world like "What is the origin of the universe?" or "What approach would you take in the Middle East?" or "What was Nicole thinking when she picked me?" You pause. You rewind. You hoped someone had the forethought to actually oil the gears which are trying to grind forward. Slowly you respond.

Also, count the number of words in that diatribe. Of course, I only respond based on concepts and not translation and cheat by reading the words/amounts on the register. Phew.

Coby takes an alternative approach. He walks up calmly. Looks the cashier in the eye, smiles and asks "Do you speak English?" to the response of "Yes, of course".

Big Ideas for a Small Planet and some freaky stuff.

2007-07-01T14:40:00.000-04:00

While I am keeping Coby company, I am watching my computer....

Timeout: What is the proper phrase here? You say that you are watching television, so if you are watching a dowload on your iTunes on the laptop, is that correct? Anyway, sorry random thought. Time in.

...and there is a great new show on the Sundance Channel called "Big Ideas for a Small Planet" which seems to intend to generate dialogue and inspire rather than beat people down (and by "people", I mean Americans") for their abuses. It is really helpful and hopeful. The show seemed to gain some momentum after the first episode, but I like it.

The other link that I watched was on YouTube -- First one is pretty cool. Second one was really cool -- but I am glad that it was not me as I would have cried like a little baby.

Derren Brown
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=evZmpsl3jI0
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cjRAcajFte0

Why we didn't go to Sardinia

2007-07-01T14:17:00.000-04:00

I almost forgot.

Friday night we were planning the weekend -- and were looking for cheap flights to somewhere exotic. There is a airline called "EasyJet" that has cheap flights to all over Europe.

Looking from Geneva, we found one that was reasonably priced. We could fly out on Saturday and return on Sunday. Perfect.
Island in the middle of the Mediterreanan. Perfect.
Noted for the beautiful beaches. Perfect.
Italian (so it didn't count as a new country). Acceptable.

...but here was the clincher...

I am pretty flexible with my choice of foods. Having spent some time in China, I can honestly say that I do not eat everything (knowing a little more about what "everything" is...), however I can easily say that I am more flexible than the average Joe. Here was one that made me not even want to go to the region. I can't even make this more dramatic than it is... taken directly from the wikipedia (so you know it is true). Read the whole excerpt. It gets better.

"Casu marzu (also called casu modde, casu cundhídu, or in Italian formaggio marcio) is a cheese found in Sardinia, Italy, notable for being riddled with live insect larvae. Casu marzu means "rotten cheese" in Sardinian and is known colloquially as maggot cheese.
Derived from Pecorino Sardo, casu marzu goes beyond typical fermentation to a stage most would consider decomposition, brought about by the digestive action of the larvae of the cheese fly Piophila casei. These larvae are deliberately introduced to the cheese, promoting an advanced level of fermentation and breaking down of the cheese's fats. The texture of the cheese becomes very soft, with some liquid (called lagrima, from the Sardinian for "tears") seeping out. The larvae themselves appear as translucent white worms, about 8 mm (1/3 inch) long. When disturbed, the larvae can jump for distances up to 15 cm (6 inches), prompting recommendations of eye protection for those eating the cheese. Some people clear the larvae from the cheese before consuming; others do not."
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Casu_Marzu

Unbelievable.

I told Coby and that is simply the story of why we chose to stick with what we know.

Signs, Cheese and Freddie Mercury

2007-07-01T06:47:00.000-04:00

I had shut the drapes and went to sleep without turning on the alarm (for once) so Coby called me at 10:30 to see if I was still coming down to go touring. We were headed off to Gruyeres, but armed a bit better than last weekend as we had ENGLISH directions on an ENGLISH map printed the day before in the office. Not that the German directions were not beautiful -- but these made the trip slightly more efficient. We headed out each of us in our normal roles. Me -- sensible driver, staying within 20% of the speed limit. Coby -- navigator and principle iPod DJ.

A special note on music -- when we hit Germany we play "99 Der Luftballoons", France -- "Lady Marmalade". We are waiting for someone on Coby's playlist to write one for Switzerland

We hit a bit of construction and I must say something about the artistry of the European standard signage. The construction sign doesn't simply imply that there is a bit of work going on -- it actually is a black and white drawing of a man with a shovel moving a bit of dirt from one larger pile to a smaller pile, and you can even see a rock that is rolling away. (This is slightly more than I need to watch as I am trying to navigate narrow and forced lane changes. ) There is also a couple of different signs for crosswalks. My favorite one is blue with a white drawing of a grandfather walking a little girl (I assume Heidi) across the street with love and affection. The other is two kids (one boy, one girl) racing from school, books and bags in hand.

Gruyeres was pretty cool. It is a castle surrounded by a little Medieval village that you can walk through. We parked at the bottom of a hill and walked up the steps through a pasture full of massive cows. (One made me nervous as he kept looking at me and licking his lips. I am not sure what cows exactly eat here, but I am hoping I don't fall into the dinner category). Each cow had a bell that was kind of tuned to be in the same key. I am normally one for "More Cow Bell!" but after a short bit here, I was ready to yell "Freeze" to the entire herd in a desperate attempt to slow the din.

We went through the castle and gardens -- very cool. We then ate at a cafe in order to grab some of the local cheese. Coby had eaten breakfast (one of the benefits of getting up in the a.m.) and was going to skip it -- but couldn't resist some good fondue. It was really good and creamy, and incredibly filling. Very nice.

We headed out, driving through mountains and vineyards, to a couple of other towns that had been recommended -- took some pictures of castles and stuff -- and ended up in Montreaux. We parked in a mall and walked along the lake. There was a festival (that promptly closed at 5) and lots of people were out walking and eating ice cream. I stopped to take a picture of Freddie Mercury who had recorded his last couple of albums there.

We returned to Geneva and took the night off. Coby watched movies in his room and I flipped my three English channels, read a bit, left a "Good Night" message for Nicole, and went to sleep.

Dinner and Entertainment -- and bartering for transportation

2007-07-01T06:11:00.000-04:00

Thursday we had gone with our British friend Julie over the Aviator for the steak. The steaks here are not as good as in the US (thinner, slightly tougher) but the garlic sauce and the all-you-can-eat skinny little french fries more than make up for it. Heavy heavy food.

Friday night we didn't do much... I grabbed a book and headed over the hotel restaurant next door, but they didn't open until 6:30. ...and then they ignored me, so I wandered up to the bar and ordered sushi. I needed something without sauce, cheese, or massive amounts of fat. I then went back to work with Coby and convinced him at about 10 that we should stop and take a break.

There was some live music over at the bar and we sat and relaxed for a couple of hours. A broadway style cast started to trickle in to party about 11:30. ...and then at midnight we got the strangest question from a bartender ever.

See, she was new to the area and with the vacation schedules between the 4 bartenders (one was off for 5 weeks only to be followed by the next one for 4 weeks) she was working 6 days a week and double shifts. Her expectation was that while the bar should close at 2, that she would not be able to leave until 4. The rule here is that if there is someone at the bar, it stays open until they finish their drinks -- and then you have to finish up cleaning, etc...

She didn't have a car and taxis to go 12 kilometers over the border to her apartment would be close to 200 Francs. (I didn't verify, but even if it was half that, holy cow!) I would have been up to offer the ride home, but my generosity generally is open from 5 a.m. to 11:30 p.m. and usually takes off holidays and weekends.

So, the perky little French girl that she was -- she called her boyfriend who did the correct thing to do in a relationship -- offered to pick her up based on the hint, instead of making her flat out ask. Smart man.

So in return, she wanted to make it up to him, but was stuck with a dilemna that continues to baffle all Americans that come visit here. All stores close down around 6 p.m. on Fridays. So, she did the only thing that she could do to pay the poor boy back. She asked Coby and I if we could give her a condom.

I will say that while I am a strong supporter of safe sex -- I would only get in trouble if I had one as it would imply that I have the intention of sex without my wife. Therefore, for discretion's sake, let's just say that we were able to fulfill her need, but not from me. ...and got a free round in return.

We at least get more presents..

2007-06-29T11:39:00.000-04:00

The Europeans get a few more holidays than we do in the U.S. The challenge of this project has been much more about scheduling resources to actually be in the office instead of any significant technical challenges. We should definitely be jealous of the time spent outside the office.

However, we do have one day a year where we "win". Today was our AP Manager's birthday. In the US, this might mean that someone would have taken her out for her birthday, or maybe a little cake or goofy presents. In EMEA, the deal is reversed. On your birthday, you are supposed to bring in something for everyone else. It works out for me, but I definitely don't plan on coming back for my birthday.

We waited to procrastinate to the last minute on our travel plans. We originally thought that we would try to fly somewhere exotic, but I think with all the work we have we need to get done, we are only going to take Saturday to tool around the countryside -- maybe to go to Gruyeres castle (for the cheese and double cream) and Interlaken for the views... TBD.

Right now it is 6 and we are going to sneak away whiles the US goes to lunch before anyone asks me to do any more "favors" for them. My favorite part of these requests are the start of the sentence... "I know that you are busy but..." or "Hey, I know that you are completely consumed with your project, but..." That "but" is a killer.

It isn't paranoia...

2007-06-26T02:31:00.000-04:00

...if they really are trying to get you. It is the subtle little things that make me think that Europe is ready for me to go home. Not necessarily trying to cause permanent damage, but enough to get the message across.

Sign 1: The shower is heat regulated, where there is a special button to press if you want it to go to more extreme temperatures. I leave it at the same place (about 42 C) yet starting in week 2, housekeeping likes to randomly change it to the highest setting. I haven't shattered the mirror jumping out of the shower -- yet.

Sign 2: The hidden wonders of the food... I learned last time that they don't pit their olives on pizza. Was a bit surprised that they didn't pit their cherries in the tarts. As I am on the home stretch for my second round of braces -- having to go home to the Orthodontist is less than exciting.

Sign 3: Laundy runs about $25/day for me. I am now in the process of buying new underwear, socks and t-shirts as it is cheaper than cleaning them. I would have to guess that this is a bit contrary to the Sierra Club approach -- but I have now spent over $200 on laundry and I am not finished. Time to go.

Sign 4: Television options. I have the European CNN, BBC Prime and BBC News. I am watching old movies in French -- and I must say that not understanding the dialogue in "Double Team" with Jean-Claude Van Damm and Dennis Rodman actually makes it watchable.

Mont Blanc

2007-06-24T14:53:00.000-04:00

Now with a new found confidence in European touring, I left Coby to do this thing (which is work) for me to see Mont Blanc. No one seemed to want to join me, so I went by myself.

I was headed in the right direction and easily crossed over into France on only my second attempt. I was headed for a town called "Chamonix" where you can take a tram up almost to the top of Mont Blanc. Unfortunately, this was a toll road and the European Union had decided on the "Euro" as a currency over what I had in my wallet -- the Swiss Franc and almighty American dollar. Let's just say this...

Toll to Chamonix -- 4.70 Euros
Cost of Deoderant to cover stress sweat smell -- 2.50
Being able to use your Visa instead of offering the car behind you 50 Francs for 5 Euros -- Priceless.
Life and French Toll Booths take Visa.

I got there and took the train to the left side of the mountain. Thought "eh", had a little lunch (a Croque Monsieur which is like a grilled ham sandwhich with Mornay sauce in it and cheese melted on top). The carved ice display was closed so there wasn't a whole lot here. There was a small museum of mountain animals were the Elk had a very odd smile on his face that was a little freaky.

So I left and drove to the place where the tram takes you up to the top. I "meant" to do that first -- but my French lessons didn't include "tram", "High Altitude" or a la Star Wars -- "This isn't the tram you are looking for..."

It was, in a word, brilliant. My pictures just cannot take in the enormity of the mountain. (Posted on my facebook page). Wow.

Wow.

Wow.

My next goal is to sneak away from Coby and take a mountaineering class. My plan is to make something crash badly next Thursday. I will let you know how I do.

Now I am back to work and eating a delivery pizza. Note: They do not cut their pizza's here even for delivery. Second note: I don't fly with a knife.

Breakfast in Switzerland, Lunch in Liechtenstein, Dessert in Austria, Dinner in Germany

2007-06-24T14:01:00.000-04:00

That was our goal. We had to do too much work to spend the night anywhere and we wanted to pick up a couple of countries. Seemed simple. 4 countries, 1 day. We would cover over 1,000 kilometers. (Is that a gilometer?)

Challenge 1. Neither of us knew how to get to Liechtenstein to get us started.
Challenge 2. We remembered to get a map after we had left the office and did not have access to a nice printer.
Challenge 3. The computer/printer at the hotel requires coins and charges by the page/minute.

Not to be overcome, I researched all of the information on my computer and then went to duplicate this on the hotel computer to print. What you should know about "google" and other websites abroad is that they cater to non-Americans. Odd, but Google in Switzerland is in German. You can choose English to search, but Google maps reverts back to German. So, as I was running out of coins, we printed directions in German. This worked fine once we realized that there the directions were telling us to turn right and not sending us to the same town over and over.

Border Crossing #1 (Switzerland to Liechtenstein)
We made Liechtenstein only to be horribly disappointed. It was a beautiful town, full of beautiful people -- sure -- but there was no McDonald's to be found. What kind of fit healthy people are these freaks? Nervous about the populace, we left Liechtenstein after settling for a tasty little brie/salami/tomato panini done with bread very reminiscent of croissant. (Coby had beer).

Border Crossing #2 (Liechtenstein to Switzerland)
We drove back across the border to head to Austria & Germany.

Border Crossing #3 (Switzerland to Liechtenstein)
We realized crossing the border that there was a cool little plaque that showed the border as we couldn't see anything else that would prove that we were here. So we turned around and took a picture

Border Crossing #4 (Liechtenstein to Switzerland)
...and then had to go back...

Border Crossing #5 (Switzerland to Liechtenstein)
...and then had to go back to get to Austria

Border Crossing #6 (Liechtenstein to Austria)
...and with that settled, we crossed over into Austria with a border guard wave of the hand. We stopped in a cute little town (Fieldriech) to satisfy the craving for mass produced meat burger product stuff at the local Herr McDonalds. Snapped some photos, I got an appel strudel at a local festival and we were on our way. I have to say that I have now seen the longest word ever. It was advertising the Sunday Buffet at the Holiday Inn and here was the word -- and I am not kidding "Langschlaferfruhstucksbuffet". I took a picture. I truly believe that the German people are so efficient in other aspects of their lives in order to make up for the time it takes them to communicate using words like that.

Border Crossing #7 (Austria to Liechtenstein)
We cannot escape... What seemed like an important destination now just seems to be in the way.

Border Crossing #8 (Liechtenstein to Switzerland)
Freeway found. We don't need no stinkin' directions. We are men. Manly men. Manly men that can't speak a lick of German so that there is no use even asking.

Border Crossing #9 (Switzerland to Austria)
Okay, now we are on a freeway... Crusing along at 140 (kilometers, but still that is moving)

Border Crossing #10 (Austria to Germany)
We were just going to pop in for our McDonald's picture, grab a Der ChikenFrufenNuggetshafen (my attempt at German) and get out. (Actually, I had a Mexican Chicken Wrap that wasn't bad.) It was called "Mexican Chicken Wrap" in German. Maybe my language skills are improving.

However, something weird was happening.

Not that I put anything past the German reputation, but we started noticing more an more people dressed in leather and boots and, well, seemed a little out of place for a stroll along the lake. We were headed down the lake to look for the ferry that could cut up to an hour out of our trip home by cutting across the lake. However, the ferry was $135 Euros and we couldn't get past the boat next to it.

To back up a bit, the lake that we were enjoying is Lake Constance which is bordered by Austria, Germany and Switzerland. There is some dispute about who governs the lake which really means that you can, in the vein I believe the Snap Dragons, "Do What You Like". This was some sort of fetish cruise. There were all kinds, ages and dressed -- although mostly undressed. ...and before anyone goes righteous on me, 90% were folks that had no business being undressed as in people that would make a mirror turn away. They were accountants and administrators, balding with glasses -- or at least that is what I focused on in order to get past the "Gimp" look. (The other 10% I admit were not too bad in a "Omigodyouareacompletefreak kind of way.) This was a car wreck that the entire town came out to watch. ...and cheer ...and bring their kids to see. This was a scene from the Twilight Zone if it were to be shown on Cinemax.

We left the scene to the sound of techno to grab a quick bite (I like to eat) at a local pub away from the masses. Quiet. Nice. Except that Team Jagermeister was promoting their stuff.... ...and wouldn't leave us alone.

We ran.

Border Crossing #11 (Germany to Austria)
Get me to my itty bitty room. Drive Coby Drive.

Border Crossing #12 (Austria to Switzerland)
1:30 a.m. "Home"

Ode to a Cookie

2007-06-22T11:21:00.000-04:00

I don't get excited about normal things I think. It is always the simplicity of the details that get me going. For instance, I watched a food network show with the legendary Alton Brown on making corned beef and the nitrates used in the "natural" process that are usually not done anymore in the US. However, here you could really see that done and the corned beef and cabbage I had for lunch the other day was awesome.

Or I got excited that the steak tartare (I love the stuff) was served traditionally where you were provided four little piles of stuff to mix in to your pleasure.

Or the plate of "exotic" fruits (that was the menu title) that I got for desserts included a perfect blackberry.

Or the green beans that I got were a beautiful mixture of different colors which looked great (even though they simply tasted like green beans).

So maybe looking back it is the little things in FOOD that I love in traveling. However, the one little thing that has just gotten me weak in the taste buds is a cookie. A wafer thin cookie (c'mon, have just one... It is waffffer thin.) But this cookie is no ordinary cookie. It is a "Finest biscuit with carmelized almonds and Swiss Chocolate" called a "MandelCaramel" cookie made by Kambly. Simple. Light. Complex. Perfect.

Maybe I just need some quality time at home.

Surprise! It tastes the same

2007-06-22T08:43:00.000-04:00

Today for lunch we drove out to the mall. Why? Because we deserved a break today.

Yep. We went to McDonald's. Having not been to this bastion of American cuisine in some time, I prepared to help Coby order in case the cashier did not speak English. See, he wanted to get a Big Mac. If you are not a McDonald's aficionado, which we are, this is two all-beef patties, special sauce, lettuce, cheese, pickles, onions, on a sesame seed bun. Coby's "Le Big Mac" is exactly that, just hold the special sauce, lettuce, cheese, pickles, onions.

I glanced over the menu. What should I get? Should I get the chicken sandwich? Should I get the special Ciabatta burger? ...and then I saw it. The one thing I must have. Menu Item Deux.

Le Royale with Cheese.

What is this? This is a Quarter Pounder with Cheese. Why don't they call it a Quarter Pounder? ...because they have the metric system, they wouldn't know what the $%@# a quarter pounder is... Ah, Vincent Vega, we hardly knew you.

Big Plans

2007-06-22T06:04:00.000-04:00

The weekend is looming ahead. We definitely feel the pressure. We are in Europe and there are expectations heaped upon our heads -- needs to see the world, needs to make exciting Monday morning conversation. The stress of doing somethinig "cool". Of course, we for the most part, are going to go with option 2, which is to try and instead garner the sympathy vote by spending the weekend working. This option definitely has rewards, but we are going to work through a compromise.

We are going to take Saturday off and run over to Lake Constance which is on the border of Austria, Germany and Switzerland. We are going to try to figure out if we can get a boat to the middle so that we can stand in three countries at the same time.

On Sunday, Coby is going to take option 2 for the entire day. I am going to "take one for the team" and go for a different experience during the day and then work through the evening. My goal is to try to go to Mont Blanc and see the sites.

I have to drive to Chamonix (France) which shouldn't be "too" hard and the great thing about our hotel is that it is very close to the airport -- so getting back is easy. This will be my first border crossing in Europe by myself. Not that it is challenging, but no one ever lets me stop and ask for a stamp in my passport. So if I don't post Sunday night, it probably because I made the border guards angry for stopping traffic and I am in some French prison.

Today we are back in the exciting hotel lobby working. I went into the office this morning for meetings, but the whole office is leaving at noon to celebrate their 10 year anniversary in Geneva. (We were not invited). We work on the wireless in the lobby so that I can secondhand smoke. Coby is very good to sacrifice and smoke here so that I can maintain my vice.

It has been a long week and I look forward to getting away from everyone for a bit.

I don't get it

2007-06-17T15:08:00.000-04:00

Wednesday, we went to a comedy club with our Scottish friends here. It was pretty funny, although there was a lot of British pop culture references that I needed a translator to laugh appropriately. I did get the one Harry Potter joke of the evening although it did involve one young guy in the audience and some not so Muggle-like sexual innuendos involving - well - not for general readers.

The work has been tough. We are pretty much getting a good list of why things will never work and having to use that to create our list of what needs to work. Simplest comparison is going blindfolded through a maze -- you can get to the end, but you are going to be pretty bruised from bouncing off all of the walls to find the exit.

Thursday and Friday we had just enough energy to sit at the hotel bar and learn French from the bartender (after leaving work between 8 and 9).

Saturday we decided to take it easy. All the shops are closed here on Sunday, so we got up and went shopping at the local Walmart (Carrefour) for snacks and diet coke. After fighting the crowds, we decided to drive to Bern and wander around. (I posted pictures on my Facebook page -- post a message if you want a link).

There was a protest march that stopped traffic, but since we didn't see any words that looked like "Death" or "Americans" we felt pretty safe wandering around. Bern is a pretty good little city. They banned wooden building back around 1400 after the last fire. The walls are around 1,000 years old, etc... Town has a bit of history.

We stopped by Einstein's apartment from back in his patent office days and arrived just in time to listen to the video in German. Oh -- and my German is not as strong as my French. My Swiss German is not as good as my regular German. So we ate Italian and I went through and decided what we should order -- and then were given English menus.

We drove back and were so energized that we drove back and took a nap. Nicole woke me up with house news and I woke Coby up just on general principle. We decided at that point to stay in.

Sunday was work all day -- and I am writing this after doing 10 hours of documentation work. So, the humor is somewhat lacking.

However, I have to tell you this...

I am in here in Switzerland eating good food. Nicole is in Lexington doing the following:
1. Cleaning House 1.0
2. Mowing/Yard work at House 1.0
3. Painting House 2.0
4. Negotiating with the realtors
5. Keeping up House 2.0

I, again, am here getting room service and complaining about a tough job. Why did she marry me again? I forget.

Hard Working Pays Off Tomorrow

2007-06-13T03:33:00.000-04:00

Yesterday went pretty well. From our November workshops, we all knew where we were going to argue and for the kickoff, we simply joked about it in preparation. There is some argument from our friends in IT that the previous efforts were not documented to their standards, but from my perspective as their executives signed off on the earlier efforts -- the amount that I care is somewhat diminished. The only way to be successful is to focus on what you can do and what you are tasked to do.

We went to lunch and I had a cheese tart that was sort of like a thin quiche. Technically, I have no idea how they made the crust on top so perfectly. Annoying. You would think that the French chef had some training.

Leaving the office at 7:30, we had to choose between working to get prepped for today -- or going out to shoot some pool with some guys in the office. It was a tough decision, but being the professionals that we are, we decided to shoot pool. Oddly, my skills had not improved by lack of playing. We then wandered over to the British bar "Mr Pickwicks" for dinner, getting in just before the 10:00 buzzer. I had steak and kidney pie -- because as they say, "When in a British Bar in Geneva..."

The fun part of the evening really was the conversation. There were six of of us -- two Americans, one French, one Brit, one Scot and one German. The British guy and I discussed conversation starter phrases. He was dating an American girl and was going to meet some family in Boston -- so I gave him a few choice phrases. For those of you that don't use conversation starters, they operate on the principle that most people are really not interested in hearing your opinion the majority of the time. Therefore, you simply need to ask a couple of questions and usually the person will happily chat on for hours and hours -- and leave with thinking that you were very enjoyable. Key learning if you ever decide to be a bartender.

Anyway -- here are the football conversation starters for the US.
1. How do you think (QB) will do this year?
2. We didn't get much draft coverage over here, how do you think that (NFL Team) did?
3. How do you think that the defense will be this year?

He didn't believe me that it was that easy, so he walked around and talked to a few Americans in the bar. Unfortunately we had not worked out conversation extraction strategies and he was stuck with each person longer than intended.

For Americans, we simply have to say something like "What do you think of the new (country leader)?" or "When do you think the UK will take the Euro?" or "Sorry about Bush".

There was also one just from Brits concerning "Christmas just isn't the same without... (two comedians that are no longer on television, forgot their names).

I may fit in just yet.

There is no place like "Home"

2007-06-12T01:37:00.000-04:00

When I travel, I am constantly torn between a need to experience the new and the need to make where I am more like home. Usually, I can go for a long period without any cravings for food, but there is always that day that I have to have a taco or don't think that I will get by without the requisite Diet Coke.

Sure, I always miss friends, family, my pillow and Nicole (not in that order of course, as Nicole and my pillow rate pretty high). However the experiences are always exciting. For lunch upon arrival, we went back to the local Carrefour and had a homemade pizza (ham, anchovy, caper, onion, tomato). For lunch the first day in the office, I had steak tartare with chips. I tried to go for sushi for dinner for an all raw day, but we didn't wrap up in time and they closed at 10 p.m.

The friends we made on the last trip were happy to see us and lunch/dinner arrangements were promised. All is very comfortable.

Where I just cannot make the travel leap is my bathroom habits. Since this trip is four weeks, we approached it a little differently as I figured everything consumable that I brought would run out and since I would have to buy it again anyway, why not just wait and buy it here? So I find myself looking for similar items from home -- better shampoo, soap, mouthwash, cold medicine -- and then looking to step it up a bit.

Is it wrong to want cushy toilet paper? Is it too American to ask for lotion on my Kleenex? Am I a wimp for eyeing the pillows with envy?

I find myself daydreaming a bit and wondering since I will be there four weeks, would I have time to paint the room a better color. Maybe I could make an arrangement with my neighbor and knock out a wall and we could spread out. (For reference, my room is the same size as Paris Hilton's cell -- literally).

Regardless, we are just focusing on the work and the plans for the weekends. Oddly, the biggest 4th of July celebration outside the US is in Geneva. We saw where Bush was a big hit in Albania so we were looking for flights/trains there. Maybe a day in Paris, Prague or Croatia. Actually -- anything to get out of my tiny room.

Today though, my project really kicks off. Folks are flying in to listen to me drone on about "Roles & Responsibilities", "RACI charts" and as many other "R" words as I can roll off my tongue.

Wish me luck. I only pretend to know what I am talking about.

For the Children...

2007-06-10T15:07:00.000-04:00

Today is Sunday. However, the "day" (a day is defined as the time from when I get up to the time I am allowed to lay down in a comfortable position and sleep) began yesterday at 3:15 in the morning.

I am in Geneva now as part of a four week "little" trip. Due to approval delays I was not able to book my tickets until it was really too late to get a "good" rate. This was complicated in that we budgeted for me to do all of this travel in January (translated: cheap rates) instead of June/July (translated: Holy-Cow-You-Can-Not-Be-Serious rates).

As the project manager, I am accountable to hitting our budget. So after berating a few of the team members, when I went to book my tickets the only way that I could hit the budget was for me to fly a slightly less than direct route from Lexington to Geneva. Best case, you can make this trip in 12-13 hours with one connection. I am not completely sure without doing the research, but I am pretty sure that the worst case is making it a 25 hour trip with 4 connections (Lexington to Atlanta to Boston to Paris to Geneva).

My first flight was at 6 a.m. Saturday morning. From reading earlier posts, you might have seen mention of my issues with sleeping on the planes. To remedy this, I was going to stay up late on Saturday to see if exhaustion drives sleep. (Turns out exhaustion + Cold medicine + boring movie options = enough snoring to miss two breakfasts).

I start this wonderful travel experience by staying up late (translate: procrastinating on packing until 10:00p.m. the night before) and a plan of getting up at 3:30 in the morning to get to the airport (relaxing my 2 hour rule) at 4:30. However, as the nervous guy, I set up a three-tiered alarm system.
- Alarm 1: Normal alarm clock set for 3:30 a.m.
- Alarm 2: Cell phone alarm clock set for 3:45 a.m.
- Alarm 3: I drank a lot of tea right before bed.

I went to bed at 12:15 and alarm 3 went off at about 1:30. I tried hitting snooze on that one, but it kept trying to go off until I finally gave up and got up at 3:15 and went for a Guiness record for length of pee. After showering to rehydrate (the California raisin look went out in the 80's) we left and made it to the airport at 4:29. For future reference, airport check-in lines do not open until about 4:36 which had not been communicated to the other 30-40 people standing in line.

The "cool" thing was that I have now traveled enough to skip the normal line and was first in line for the frequent traveler/first class line. So, this early on a Saturday morning, I could feel the love all around me. Most of the travelers were headed through Atlanta on their way to vacations like Disney World, so there were a few little kids with questions like "Mommy, why did that man get to go before us?..."

Unbeknownst (wow, I never get to use that word) to any of us, there was a bit of weather brewing in Atlanta which required one person to "deplane" so that their weight could be offset by additional fuel for circling Atlanta. (Isn't deplane a silly word like you have a plane growing like a mole on your back and you need to be "deplaned"). The flight attendant begged from the lobby. No takers -- apparently the other travelers wanted their vacations. The flight attendant begged from the plane and started offering $200 flight vouchers. I snoozed. The flight attendant begged and begged and mothers started looking nervous when it was mentioned that someone would be drawn "randomly".

The flight attendant offered $400 -- so I took it -- for the children.

Interestingly (is that a word?) the guy that started out as the jerk, was later applauded by the whole plane.

I really can't say much else. My bags went to Atlanta and then Boston. I went to Cincinnati, but with a 7.5 hour layover in Boston, they had plenty of time to drive themselves, stopping to see the museums, and meet me there. We then happily met each other in Geneva.

I actually slept most of the rest of the trip.

Throwing Cans of Dr. Pepper at the Squirrels

2007-06-10T14:32:00.000-04:00

Actually, it was one can of Diet Cherry Vanilla Dr. Pepper but that wasn't quite as catchy of a title.

Also, for those of you that prefer your squirrels in "scampering" mode rather than those of you that like your squirrels in a little gravy on biscuits -- I should state quickly that my keen sense of distance and timing, coupled with my strong athletic ability, was in such a high form that I was able to hit the same yard that the squirrel was in, but just barely.

To tell the story, I should start at the beginning. Not quite so far back as the "When a Daddy and a Mommy love each other...", but back about a year. My wife wanted a new house and had very specific requirements. She wanted at least 4 bedrooms with a large utility room with a basement with a nice kitchen in a good neighborhood with good schools with friendly neighbors with children holding hands and singing in the streets. I, on the other hand, just wanted trees.

We, meaning Nicole, looked and looked and finally nagged enough about a house that we went, looked, fell in like and closed in the span of 20 days (including loans, etc.) This was properly efficient for me to puff out my chest and feel good about my project management skills.

However, for those of you that have not moved into a second house, there is a universal law that things will start to go bad with everything just as you are trying to sell and then after you have signed all the paperwork and are in the new house.

For example, one week before the move House 1.0 decided that the dryer was a unnecessary luxury. After all, it was warm outside and with all the talk of global warming, we could spare the electricity. However, there was not a committee meeting to discuss the issue and my wife was not in agreement. It was still under warranty (dryer door issue) but still -- frustrating.

Not to be outdone, House 2.0 decided that a functioning garage door was also an unnecessary luxury and decided to go on strike by unattaching itself from the actual door. Again, in our fine democracy, there was no meeting, vote or majority consensus.

So that is why on a fine Friday morning I was parked outside our lovely house under our lovely old oak tree. The same oak tree that a family of blue jays had under contract with the city for air rights -- and felt that the angry sqawking was not enough escalation for me to speed up my process of removing myself from their property.

So they pooped on me.

Startled, I did the only thing I could think of as appropriate for the time. I let out a squeak like a little girl, threw the soda can I was carrying and nearly hit an innocent squirrel.

Read This Blog

2007-05-18T22:07:00.000-04:00

So my last post was almost 4 months ago to the day.

This post is simply to get my friend Tria to stop pestering for a freakin' post.

Love always. Matt.

40 Degree Drop

2007-01-14T20:13:00.000-05:00

It has been a little while since my last little notes -- but I miss writing this little blog. Or at least I miss the imaginations that people are laughing at my little adventures. As always, my goal is simply to bring joy to the people -- even if it IS always about me.

My next trip is to visit a friend in Ottawa. Now you should know that he his a friend because I am headed into the Arctic in the middle of the freakin' winter to see the guy. Last check, it was 40 degrees colder there than here.

He used to live in Lexington, but started a company with two of my other colleagues (www.mercurygrove.com). This originally was going to be just me -- but the other two guys are going to go as well. We intend to experience the real Canada -- the hocky, the curling and the funny little thing called poutine.

Poutine, as I understand is cheese fries and gravy (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Poutine). Now, I should say that one of my New Year's resolutions involved weight loss as I weigh about 50% more than I did when I graduated college. Oddly, this menu item actually shows up in Weight Watchers.

In the same conversation where my friend was complaining that the canal was not completely frozen over, he asked that I bring my swim suit and a pair of sandles. I must say that I have watched way too many Road Runner/Coyote cartoons to fall for that one. I can only hope that he means that the walk to the indoor hot springs requires footwear.

Also, oddly enough, it seems that the most direct route from Cincinnati to Ottawa is through Atlanta. I really need to find someone in air traffic control.

Funny Shaped Football

2006-11-13T13:31:00.000-05:00

We went out last night to watch football at the local pub http://www.pickwick.ch/ We got there at 6:00 -- which was an hour before game time and the place was so packed on both floors that there was no place to sit -- and barely room to stand. Their was a soccer match on (Arsenal thrashed Liverpool) and for a short amount of time I thought we had gotten it terribly wrong in translation and the NFL wasn't going to be on...

After the Arsenal game, the place pretty much cleared out. Magically, they chose to show the Bengals game. Or, for those who saw the game -- the Ladamien Tomlinson show. There were a number of Chargers fan there. I grabbed bacon cheeseburger (with sauce) and fries. Not stellar -- I still miss the Harry's mini burgers.

Random other thoughts
The first night we were here we went to a local place for dinner where the name essentially translated to "Spitoon". When we walked in, it looked like a number of the tables had these massive lava lamps sitting on them. Under closer inspection, they were clear pvc like tubes of beer with a tap on the bottom. They sold them in 5 Liter quantities. This same place was doing kareoke. I was in a bad European/American Idol sequence -- I don't watch the show, but I imagine I was in the part where they do the early auditions. Random folks singing off-key in English -- bad. Random folks singing off-key in random languages -- oddly, equally as bad.

Italy

2006-11-12T10:27:00.000-05:00

Last weekend we went down to Italy. Why? Because we can...

Herve had scoped out Genoa as potentially a fun place to go. (See link on the left) It is about 4 hours south of Geneva and is the 2nd largest port in Europe (and the birthplace of Christopher Columbus). We took the tunnel through Mont Blanc (wow) and ended up in town with little difficulty.

On the way, Coby had downloaded Italian lessons from "World Nomads" so that we could learn some basic phrases. So we learned how to say "Hello" and "Thank You". Apparently you can download a variety of language courses from them for free. As the instructions progress, you learn more and more useful phrases which culminated with "Don't shoot! These aren't my drugs". Um. thanks.

We parked downtown and looked around for places where we wanted to be that night. I took a lot of pictures of the old architecture with narrow streets and beautiful detail work on the buildings which were easily older than our country.

We wandered into a little Italian restaurant to get pizza. Coby went exotic and got a four cheese pizza. I got mine with anchovies so that I wouldn't have to share... It was good.

We found out about a couple of clubs and then found a hotel. It turned out to be the same hotel that George Bush stayed at for the G8 summit. It was right on the harbor and seemed incredibly palatial after the Geneva walk-in closet. The odd thing was the bathroom (again). You walked into the room and it was entirely marble. Now this was a four star hotel -- as the hotels in Europe all have to publish their ratings on their signs. So the bathroom had the normal sink and toilet -- and a bidet, a shower and a rack to heat your towels. Okay, so nice. However, when you take a step back, you realize that there is not a division between any of it. So the shower did not have a curtain or walls. It essentially just drained into the drain in the middle of the room. (I found out later that this is common in the US in big houses and is called a "Rain Room"). I did think that it was kind of ironic that they gave us a soap labeled "Bath soap" because if I made this a bath, it was going to take a lot of water and som caulk around the door.

Being the manly men we are, we took naps that afternoon in lieu of dinner. I wandered next door to the aquarium and was entertained by a very active octopus. At the stingray petting area, a little girl wandered up to me and asked me if they bite. I said no, and complimented her on her English, asking her where she was from... California.

We then went to a club for Coby to roll the dice and try his luck meeting Italian women. Oddly, he had better luck talking up a Danish woman there on business as absolutely no other women there spoke English. We closed the place -- and got back to the hotel at a respectable 5 a.m.

The next morning we headed back after getting the requisite new country McDonald's for Coby. After 3 countries doing this -- amazingly it all tastes the same.

People / Nightlife

2006-11-12T10:16:00.000-05:00

The nightlife in Geneva is relatively tame.

Every night we have gone out to blow off a bit of steam. Friday night last week we went out with a Scottish guy here to a local pool hall to shoot a bit before heading over to an Irish pub for live music.

In Asia and South America, folks are pretty interested in talking to us. It was typically a bit rare for Americans to be in some of the places we had been, so the conversations ran more along the lines of "What are you doing here" and "How do you like it..."

In Europe, they have their fair share of Americans and we are nothing special. In talking to folks here "on the street", the fall into 1 of 2 categories: 1) Oh, American... or 2) Oh, American -- (insert anti-Bush politics here).

In the office, everyone is really nice. The folks on our team usually do their own thing for lunch or dinner - but are pretty good in the meetings. They are much more formal here, so I am working a nice little balance of getting what I need by having the correct manager in the room to reason out the requirements assuming I can't get what I want from the direct staff.

Tonight (Sunday) we are going out with a Scottish guy back to the Irish pub as they play the NFL games live. With the time change, the first game starts at 7 here. Knowing what this is going to be like -- I have already done all of the work for Monday morning as I figure I will be worthless until about 9.

The people in the office have also been very helpful in suggesting what to do on weekends. However, I did uncover a conspiracy between Herve and Coby to prevent anyone from talking to me about Mont Blanc -- which is just a few miles away and visible from the office window. Apparently, you can take a tram 2/3 of the way up to the top. They were hoping I wouldn't find out. I did -- but got vetoed until the spring thaw.

Food

2006-11-12T09:46:00.000-05:00

I am going to cheat a bit and blend some of the days together by topic...

The food here is amazing. We also argue whole heartedly against the concept that American portions are larger. I have gained weight on this trip. I know it -- but I can't stop eating. Everytime I go into the cafeteria and say that I am just going to get a salad, that is it and I am going to be good today -- I get completely distracted by the wall of tarts and desserts. The Swiss chefs are malicious and evil. ...but how can it be wrong if it tastes so right!?! (but I digress).

I have been able to guess quite well at what things are and I have only been surprised a couple of times. 1) I thought that I was getting a carrot thing and it turned out to be a winter squash thing. 2) I thought I was getting regular creme brulee and it was a nutmeg version.

Raclette
For example the sheer goodness of the food, one night we drove to a nearby town in France for Raclette. Raclette, for those of you who may not know (I had never heard of it) is about 1/8 of a big round of cheese (Raclette) that they set near a moveable heat lamp for 2 people to each adjust. As the cheese melts, you scrape it up/off and put it on potatoes, meats or bread.

So the waiter brings out this massive thing and a bottle of wine. He opens the wine and offers me the cork. I am thinking, "Buddy, I am about to eat 2-3 pounds of cheese -- a cork is the last thing I need. I might, however, need your corkscrew if you are looking to offer up a gift."

Hunting Season
We are also here during hunting season which means that we have choices of red deer, reindeer, wild boar and other cute cuddly animals that are quite tasty with bread and sides. I have not gotten to the wild boar, but there is a restaurant whose name translates to "The Carnivore" which we are targeting for this week.

The first day in the cafeteria I had venison stew. The first night out I had my first foie gras (goose liver) and venison steak. The next day for lunch I had a venison something or other... At this point, someone would expect to hear a nice little DEER God!

Prices
Fondue -- awesome. Raclette -- awesome. Having 12 choices for outstanding tarts -- awesome. Having to pay 20-25 USD for lunch. Ouch.

We finally realized how some of the extreme prices were occurring. For lunch, a 1/2 liter (20 oz) bottle of "Coke Light" is 4 Francs = $3.20. It would be about 2 dollars cheaper if I drank beer. I moved to water. Dinner is just an expectation to go middle of the road with the menu to pay about $25 to $30. I am REALLY glad that I am on an expense account

Ordering
I have tried very hard to only speak French when ordering. I usually get a decent distance into it before there is a bit of eye rolling and they switch to English. However, I was very proud to say that yesterday (Saturday) I made it through the whole process, no worries. It went something like this...
- Bonjour Monsieur (Hello sir.)
- Bonjour Monsieur, Deux, s'il vous plait. (Hello sir back. 2 please)
- Fumer ou non-fumer (Smoking or non)
- Fumer (Smoking for Coby)
- blah blah blah Order (something about are we ready to order)
- Oui, Raclette pour deux et une assiette a frites (Yes, Raclette for 2 and basket of fries)
- Oui, bon choice blah blah blah (okay, good choice and then something about what to drink)
- Deux l'eau (two waters)
- Avec gasse ou non (with gas or not)
- Avec, merci (bubbly thanks)
- Oui, monsieur (Yes sir)

...and then he delivered the food and told us in perfect English, "Careful, the plate is hot"

Departure, Arrival and Apologies

2006-11-12T09:20:00.000-05:00

All -- thanks for sending the kind little reminders that I was behind in keeping this up. It does make me feel good to know that folks are reading it. We have just had 12-16 hour days for this trip followed by lengthy dinners, and so sleep won out over creative writing.

Departure
Dad picked me up at home and dropped me off at the airport. I, of course, was there 2 hours prior to departure as they say you should. After check-in (line of 2) and security (line of 0) -- I made it to the gate with only 1:55 to spare. Phew.

I have only made the "medallion" status on 1 out of 4 airlines for this year -- so I am limited to 50 pounds per bag. I took more this time as laundry is so expensive, but limited myself to 1 bag to save room and in order to receive less antagonizing from my colleagues. Unfortunately, my bag was 53 pounds. The lady asked if there was anything that I could do to lessen my weight. Looking down at my potbelly, I thought "apparently not". I should also note that when I pack I really do focus on balance, weight, breakage, wrinking and space -- so the thought of opening up my suitcase and readjusting was not, as we would say here, brilliant! I also had carefully packed most of the extra electronic equipment to set up our conference room in the suitcase so that I had a very minimal amount in my carry on in order to fit better in the puddle jumper initial flight out of Lexington. Sigh. So I took my three sweaters out of the suitcase and rammed them ever so gently into my backpack. Weigh in now successful -- however, as expected, the backpack would not fit in the carryon...

We met up in Newark and Coby got us into the medallion lounge. We pigged out on cheese and crackers with little concept that we would be sick of the same in a short week's time.

Our flight left Newark on time and was relatively uneventful. I continued my stellar streak of sitting near a screaming baby. However, as I was going away for about 3 weeks, this method of birth control was a bit unnecessary. The movies were "Talledega Nights" and "Pirates of the Caribbean - Dead Man's Chest". I started/finished my book -- A Simple Plan.

Arrival
We arrived in Geneva the next morning and went through customs with no issue. (I had to ask for a stamp for the passport. ) We got our car and couldn't get out of the parking space as the dashboard and manual were in German -- and the parking break required a Ctrl-Alt-Delete combination to turn it off. 15 minutes and an exasperated parking attendant later, we were good to go.

The hotel is about 2 miles from the airport. We were not able to check in for a few more hours to shower -- so we went downtown for a bit. For the hotel, the rooms are very small but relatively efficient. The odd thing is that the bathroom door will actually swing inwards and lock off the toilet from the rest of the bathroom, so that there is access to the sink/shower while someone is dropping the kids off at the pool. However, if you are (a) unfamiliar with this approach and (2) very tired from not sleeping for about 36 hours -- it can be a bit confusing. Picture this... I walk into the room and set my bags down and go into the bathroom. I see only a sink and shower. Having seen bathrooms all over the world, I thought maybe this was a Swiss thing. I figured I was fine 1/2 the time, but looking between the sink and shower -- the other 1/2 of the time was going to be a bit messy.

Geneva downtown was a nice mix of modern and old. We drove/walked around -- but I really was in too much of an insomniacal stupor to remember much. We did mark the location of the McDonald's to come back for Coby.

Next Trip - Geneva

2006-10-28T08:01:00.000-04:00

We leave Tuesday for Geneva. There are three of us this time -- Coby (my colleague that went with me to Colombia) and Herve (my colleague that went with me to Mexico). Interesting dynamics -- Coby and Herve have worked together for a few years and I am new to the team, but we all get along pretty well. Coby & Herve are big fans of gansta rap -- which included reminders sent to each other to bring MP3 players so that for our long weekend trips that we would have something to listen to in the car... So don't be surprised if I come back all "thug" or whatever the kids are calling it these days.

This is going to be a pretty different trip in that for all the other countries, the American dollar went a pretty long way. I understand that in Geneva, everything is expensive. So while I may not be able to buy anything personally, I figure that I will drown my sorrows in expense reimbursable fondue. Not too shabby.

More later on the trip I guess... From a planning perspective, it is actually warmer there than here. More sweaters, less shirts I assume. We have to go through Newark where my only real experience was arriving on a late flight connecting to Boston where all of the restaurants had closed and we were forced to bribe the guy to be able to eat the shrimp out of the display case. (We later arrived in Boston at 2 and they had closed the main road to our hotel for construction -- we eventually arrived at the hotel at 3 and had an 8a.m. presentation.)

Pictures

2006-10-01T09:33:00.000-04:00

Nicole was gracious enough to add pictures to our Flickr page (I am not sure that I have the patience) -- but there are a few hundred pictures there if you want to see the sites. I may even eventually spend a month and get captions going so that you know where/what they are... ;-)

Link to the left.

Farewell Party

2006-09-30T22:39:00.000-04:00

Reneka, Tom, Michelle, Andrea, Bobby, Elena, Tim, Christi, Ryan, Andy, Jim, Jeremy, Beth, TJ, RJ, Sandhya, Nicole, Yash

Thank you for coming to see this guy (who isn't really going too far) off!

Andy, Praveen, Rick, Barb, Christi, Sandhya, Rachana, Muzammil, Joe, Doug H. (especially Doug H.), Ryan, Reneka, Yash, Angie, Sandy, Tom S., Tim, Jim, Tom P., Jeremy, Pam, Doug A., Christine, Craig, Michelle, RJ, TJ

Thank you for the kind word and awesome going away picture. This is by far the best gift I have ever received and will be hung proudly in my office.

Gene -- Thanks for footing what I think was a rather sizable bill. That was truly a class act -- and I only had water, I swear.

Tom, Michelle -- hey, you even brought pie. mmmmmm.... I love pie.

Friday night at McFadden's, the old crew sent me off to the new job. It was a perfect night -- never a single goodbye or "We will see you", it was just another Friday night happy hour with my good good friends. There was not a person there that I wouldn't have wanted to see -- and they even let me win one game of pool. Reneka & Nicole even ordered the good little cheesy eggrolls and let me have a couple. Tom with the blackberry pie. To quote Brad Pitt in "The Devil's Own" -- "You are a good man, Tom".

Thank you all. I am truly touched.

Colombia: Triumphant Return

2006-09-30T22:20:00.000-04:00

Thursday
This was our last day/night in country. We had planned all along for this to be pretty much an all night out on the town event where we would get just enough sleep to have a hard time getting up in the morning and potentially missing our flight.

Work wrapped up nicely. The system implementation was successful and our sponsors were out of the country, spread across the continent -- so we didn't have to worry too much about the niceties of things like verifying that everything worked through actual use. Mission accomplished.

For the evening, I still had to pack. Normally this would be no big deal, but I wanted to get through the added challenges of having 1) glass items, 2) large pieces of art work, and 3) I really didn't feel like it. The latter would prove to be the biggest challenge the next morning at 4:30 when we were to meet in the lobby around 5ish.

Since we had been so successful in the past with our taxi service -- and by successful we meant that we were 1) still alive, 2) not kidnapped, and 3) in the general area where we were supposed to be -- we decided to take it easy and simply go back to our local hang out, the Bogota Beer Company. This time it was kind of nice as when we came in (Note: my credit card did eventually work!) the wait staff all greeted us with handshakes (men) or the Latin cheek kiss thing (women). I felt like I was in Cheers. We talked until around midnight and left to get ready back at the hotel.

Friday
We get up really early and I am prety dehydrated and I am starting to get what would become a nice little sinus infection. I should mention now that I strongly recommend against flying with a sinus infection unless you enjoy the added excitement of wondering whether your head could actually explode.

The airport was interesting. First -- traveling with a Platinum airline member (Coby) rocks. The line for the normal folk was literally about 150 deep -- Platinum line 2. We get through that line and queue up for the immigration line. I don't mind this one so much as it means I get the little reward of a stamp in the passport. From this line we go through a very personal and intimate pat down and metal detection of the security line. We then go to our gate to wait until they make us leave the area, search/clear the room and then have us go back through security at the gate.

On the plane, we had to wait for a while as we were randomly selected to have our plane weighed. I will say that taking off in the middle of the mountains, the choice between ensuring our plane was of the proper weight or acting out the key scenes from "Alive" would always have me choosing the former. However, whenever I get a cold I start pouring in the fluids and there was not a bathroom between security checkpoints 3 and 4. The good news was that this took my mind off my head. I finally got up and stuck past the attendant and made it. Life is good.

We landed in Atlanta and Delta, realizing that my trip was going too smoothly -- decided to do emergency work on a runway and delayed my flight 3 hours. This after I made it through customs, Coby checked me into the Crown room and I left its warm free comfort to go to my gate. Sigh.

The flight home was uneventful minus the lightening storm and the most abrupt landing of my life. All is well -- and about 5 days later I was finally well.

Colombia -- Fool me once...

2006-09-21T18:36:00.000-04:00

Wednesday (Night)
It was after 8 when we got out of work, so We decide to press our luck and go back to the Bogota Beer Company for dinner. As we approach the restaurant, the guard that had chased us down comes up to us smiling (Coby had given him a nice tip) and we laugh, shake hands, and say a few words to each other in a language that neither of us would understand.

We are accepted through the metal detection, receive friendly waves from the waitresses, and go to the bar as it is the only place to sit. At the bar, is one friendly guy that speaks great English (although oddly with an Eastern European Accent) and we get to talking about Colombia (same conversation, see earlier blog).

Oh -- dinner I order the club sandwhich and fries -- which was good, but they fry an egg into the bread.

I decide to mix up the conversation a bit and ask him if he ever gets much counterfeit money. He says, "Yes, actually earlier this week" and he goes on to relay the story. I told him, "Yeah -- that was me...". He looks in horror, apologizes and tells me if he had known it was me, he would have been okay with the money as he knew that we would have gotten it from a bank. (blah blah blah). We laugh about it -- no worries...

Then I go to pay for dinner with my credit card and it doesn't work.

My wife rocks

2006-09-20T18:56:00.000-04:00

Today is Nicole's birthday. She is older than she would like, but she looks young enough that I still get the jealous stares... Life is good.

Let take a second and list a few reasons why my wife rocks... I am going to go with 11 since I understand Letterman's legal team is hard-core.

11. It is her birthday and I am in Colombia and she is cool with it.
10. I also am going to miss our anniversary and she understands
9. There is a chance I will miss Valentine's Day and she just describes the flowers that she likes
8. She went hiking with me in Montana for her vacation this year -- and that isn't her thing. She even enjoyed it.
7. She let's me travel
6. She is genuinely happy to talk/chat with me when I am available
5. She doesn't get grumpy if I can't talk for a couple of days
4. She doesn't ask for a lot of souvenirs or expect gifts -- just a bigger house
3. She still thinks about 1/4 of my jokes are funny
2. She has earned herself a great job

1. She puts up with me.

to quote Ricky Bobby... "Thank you God for my smokin' hot wife..."

Colombia - Pink

2006-09-20T18:38:00.000-04:00

Tuesday
Today was a good day. We had launched the system on Monday, but today we sent our first item all the way through the approvals. To quote the A-Team, "I love it when a plan comes together."

To celebrate, we went out for dinner in a new mall near the hotel. We wandered around looking at menus and we settled on a restaurant named "Pink". Coby went with the spaghetti and I chose the "Lomo" cut of steak because it came with "Risotti Pink" which I assumed was the risotto of the house. The dish came with the steak nicely laid out in the wine reduction gravy. It was beautiful, but easily overlooked by the shockingly pink risotto. I am not sure what makes pink -- I had a fear of cherry risotto or something from an unknown beef origin -- but I think it was just food coloring. It had a nice bite and the flavor of the cheese was subtle and nice. The plate also had a nice pear/cheese slice. Anyway -- I got dessert again which was some red berry strudel thing. It was also good.

We waddled back to the hotel and called it an early night.

Arrested Development

2006-09-19T11:29:00.000-04:00

I have been told that it is annoying that when I want to punctuate the start of my sentence that I use the word "So". As in "So, you think I actually am concerned what you think..." or "So, why would you possibly notice something as trivial as that...." I only think of that because I was going to start this blog as you would expect....

Monday
SO, you are going to travel internationally and you need cash. AAA or other local banks don't give you a great exchange rate, so I get enough cash for the initial taxi and food from the airport currency exchange. Not a big deal. However, it is a big deal if the cash is counterfeit.

Fast forward a 1 1/2 weeks into the trip. We go back to the Bogota Beer Company (our fourth time) because they are the only place we have seen with a big screen television to watch the Monday Night Football game. We watch the beautiful event (Steelers lost) and pay for our dinner. (On a side note, I felt brave and ordered an item from the menu because it was the only thing where I didn't recognize a single ingredient in the description. It was thick ribs of a porkish origin.) Since it is towards the end of my trip, I pay in cash with a nice tip for the nice waitress (I didn't have small bills and was tired and didn't want to wait) and leave.

We are walking back the four or so blocks to our hotel when we hear someone shouting as us in Spanish. Here is my response. I ignore it because...
1) I don't like to be shouted at
2) I am walking on a dark street in a foreign street in a town known for kidnapping
3) I don't speak Spanish
4) I figure it isn't for me
5) Most importantly, I am really really tired and just want to go to bed.

I mentioned in an earlier blog that there is a lot of private security for the office -- well, this also carries over to the hotel and restaurants. There are at least 3 security guards at the restaurant that do the wand thing over you to get in. One of these guards (a pudgy one) was running towards us, huffing and puffing. He says something. We respond saying in Spanish that we don't speak Spanish. (I always have thought there is some good irony in that.) He speak more Spanish and somehow wants to follow us to the hotel. He is holding my 50,000 peso bill in his hand.

We get back to the hotel and he argues his way through security to the front desk. We follow along curiously -- but also because we now feel bad for the guy as he is still out of breath. It turns out that the restaurant thought that the bill was counterfeit. The hotel scans it through a checking machine thing, holds to the light, rubs it on white paper and tastes it... They think that it is real. They exchange it for another and my time as an international counterfeiter is over.

The best part is that I finally got to my room for a great night's sleep.

Colombia - I know a girl...

2006-09-17T22:38:00.000-04:00

Saturday
Everyone had said that if you do anything in Bogota, you need to see the Gold Museum. It is the largest collection in the world of really old gold artifacts. It is set up very well -- but I must say that it is tough to go through if you cannot read any of the signs.

The day started with breakfast and then we had the hotel call for a cab again. They were very concerned both Friday night and today -- and took down our room numbers and cab numbers so that if our bodies were discovered, they could track down the perpetrator. (I assume).

Days of Thunder had been on one of the channels that was in English and all I could think of as we whipped in and out of traffic (he actually used his emergency brake a couple of times to stop suddenly so that he could switch lanes) all I could think of was "rubbing is racing". Thankfully, HR had finally gotten me all set up and Nicole is set with life insurance.

We went to the museum and wandered through the markets and streets. Our directions (and map) was not too much help as we could not find street signs. At one point we decided that we had gotten far enough away from the good path and that if we could make it back to "sketchy" it would be an improvement.

I bought some emeralds from a local guy pretty cheap, so I can't wait to get back to see if they are real. (I think they are, but then again my IT background did not include training in gemology.)

It also didn't help that at one point -- hypothetically -- we found a young woman that might or might not have been selling some movies which might or might not have led us down some alleys though storefronts, etc...

The one thing that was really cool was that there were a number of those guys (they all seemed to be guys) that would act like statues in different dress. There was a shepherd hanging out at the cathedral, a knight, and a jester. They were pretty cool.

When we finally decided that we gave up and should ask a guard -- we realized that we had made a big circle and were about 45 yards away from where we started at the museum. So, more confidently now, we wandered around the presidential residence (no pictures allowed) and other wonderful architecture. Some guards were there for decoration. The ones with automatic weapons and in constant communication with each other -- may have been serious.

After a nice lunch in a local hamburger place called "McDonald's" -- I had the McTasty combo -- we found a place that would sell soccer jerseys. I got one from the local team. We had the guy get us a taxi and we repeated the experience of the morning, just in reverse.

After our wonderful success with maps and directions, we decided to simply walk down the street to go back to the Bogota Beer Company which had a great outdoor patio. It is Valentine's day in Colombia so we had figured that all of the local restaurants would be packed.

We got a table and there was a nice couple next to us. I helped them take a picture of themselves and that started a couple hour conversation (see earlier blog). They had a 2 month old son and this was their first night out. It ended with invitations to their home for dinner. I am supposed to email them on Monday. Very nice folks...

So at this point, it is about 1ish so they leave. There is a new group of 5 couples that comes over and ask us to join their table and we have a great conversation (see earlier blog). They were a lot of fun -- so we closed the bar down. They finally kicked us out just after 3. They walked us back to our hotel and made promises to call us for lunch (they did not which was fine...)

Sunday
Started a bit slower today. We had breakfast (great omelette) and went to the local market where I bought some watercolors and verified that I got a good deal on the emeralds.

The goal was to get back in time for football, but unfortunately here is the literal order of sports preference:
1) Soccer (there were 6 different games on)
2) Baseball
3) Billiards
4) Volleyball
5) Golf
6) Tennis
57) NFL.

I bought the wireless service from the hotel so that I could work and see the scores (18 USD/24 hours). I wandered out at one point to get passion fruit sorbet and dinner from the grocery store.

On the sandwiches, let us just say that a little knowledge is a dangerous thing. I saw (Pollo) and recognized that as chicken. Chicken is good. Chicken Salad however in a foreign country may turn out to be less than stellar. Stay tuned.

Anyway, I missed the Bengals but they are showing the Sunday night football game and I must say that the Spanish announcers are better for me than John Madden.

Colombia - Working for the Weekend, Friday Edition

2006-09-17T19:52:00.000-04:00

Friday Night
This is going to be an interesting gig. My compadre is single. As a single guy, he is always on the lookout, as anyone else in his place would be, for women of like mind. This is contrasted by me -- who 1) was never really good at it anyway and 2) haven't suited up for the wingman role in about 10+ years.

If Nicole is reading this -- I don't even notice that other women exist. (cough)

Based on recommendations from the office, hotel and anyone on the street that could "Habla Anglais" -- we head to the "T-Zone" for dinner/drinks/music/whatever. (Bogata uses zones for areas of similar use, i.e., the G-Zone is for Gourmet as in the best restaurants).

We wander down the streets (two streets that have a T intersection) to see what is what. Surprisingly, I do not blend him -- but wait, there is hope. We see a "Pub" which is British, so naturally there should be other leprachaun-looking folks to help me not stand out. (Not so). On recommendations from nutritionists everywhere, we go with the cheese fries for dinner. We stay here for a few hours for the scenery.

Next we head out to wander a little further. We see the requisite Hard Rock Cafe and so we go in primarily to use the bathroom, but to get the requisite souvenirs as well. We sit at the bar and the bartender speaks English very well so we decide to stay until two beyond inebriated local gents decide that they should strike up a conversation with us. 30 minutes and at least 8 introductions later (they kept forgetting that they had already told us their names) the bartender rescued us by 1) getting us to an outdoor table and 2) getting security to kick them out. His response was that he did not want us to have a bad experience in Colombia. We sit outside enjoying the weather when the next local decides to chat with us. We are still a little freaked out by the first guys, but we stay and talk for a while. They were really fun and interesting.

Everyone so far essentially has the same discussion with us... We really should practice to make this more interesting.

Topic 1 - Hello, introductions and why are you in Bogota
Topic 2 - What do you think of Bogota
Topic 3 - The women of Bogota are beautiful, no? (but you should go to Medellin)
Topic 4 - What do Americans think of Colombia?

Oddly -- by the end of the weekend we had that same exact conversation with every single person we talked with... Woman or man it didn't matter.

My opinions are pretty simple... Bogota is beautifully green with amazing mountains. The food is great, the people are great and I really enjoy the architecture. The women are beautiful, yet I am not looking. Americans believe what they see in movies - but I will go back and tell everyone what a great time I had.

We eventually leave and go to get a cab. Now the way this should work is that you do not accept a cab off the street. You also never should get in a cab with more than one person. I don't ask questions -- I just accept the rule.

So, we go to one of the army guys on the street and ask for help getting a cab. He waves down the next one, checks the credentials and we go on our way.

Colombia - Are you going to eat that?

2006-09-17T19:40:00.000-04:00

Friday
Today the second in command, was taking us to lunch. The plan was to go to lunch late and then call it a day. We drove to a famous place outside of Bogota in a place named "Chia" for lunch.

The place was incredibly eclectic where the owner had made all sorts of things (art?) from scraps of metal. We ordered the the best empenadas that I had ever had. Then things got a little, as Coby would say, "Out of Control."

Coby, it is important to note, is very clear about what he will eat. The following did not make that list.

1) Corn Tortillas -- so far, so good.
2) The large intestine of a cow stuffed with blood, rice and spice. (actually really good.)
3) Something he wouldn't tell me until after I had eaten it.

Now let us step back and ponder for a moment the third item. From my China adventures, I was very familar with the "not telling" approach, and in all honesty, I think that it had served me very well. However, if the "large intestine of a cow stuffed with blood, rice and spice" made the "telling you" cut -- what could this possibly be?

It looked like a small noodle. Fried. Tasted only slightly chewy with a strong taste of liver. Okay, so I liked it. Now what is it? Well, I was disappointed to find out it was only small intestine. Now before anyone with a medical background explains to me what the small intestine is, does or the safety or foolhardiness of eating such -- enough time has passed that I really don't want to know.

We drove back through the beautiful countryside and returned to work. We were almost ready for the weekend. Almost.

Colombia -- Settling in

2006-09-17T19:28:00.000-04:00

Thursday
Thursday we finally started getting more time with the folks that we needed. The day started early as I had a conference call with Europe, so I was one of the first folks in the office.

We had lunch at a restaurant in the mall. We thought at first that I had a steak done cowboy style -- but it turned out that the correct translation was that I had a horse steak. (It was good. Sorry Jayme.) For dessert I had Maracuya pie which was a wonderful tart citrus ice box pie. Not knowing what it was, we asked the waitress if we could see the fruit. She cut one open for us and let us try to original fruit. Still wonderful...

So I go to Babblefish to find out the translation fo Maracuya. If you translate "maracuya" from Spanish to English it translates very nicely to "maracuya". Helpful. So I go to the Wikipedia (English version). Maracuya only appears as a non-US flavor for Gatorade. Hmmm... So I google it -- and it translates in English to "Passion Fruit". So I had a passion fruit pie.

That has since gotten on my passion fruit kick... I bought some marmalade to bring home, I have had maracuya sorbet, etc.... I love it.

Also, I should say that all of the fruit here is wonderful. At 8600 feet, in Montana you are above the tree line. In Colombia, everything is green and beautiful. They are so close to the equator that everything grows here. Passion Fruit is one of the cheapest fruits. For breakfast in the morning (when I go), I have fresh squeezed orange juice and similarly papaya juice. I love this place.

Thursday was a long day for work -- we didn't leave until about 10. I didn't have as much to do, but my contractor needed to stay and I have a strong philosophy to never leave a man behind.

So, dinner was room service pizza which was an excellent reminder that for my next trip I was going to bring an ingredients dictionary.

Colombia - the country mouse goes to the city

2006-09-17T19:22:00.000-04:00

Sunday
Sunday the flight left at 11:30 so I got to the airport around 9:30. Security took all of 5 minutes, so I sat at the restaurant and read while I waited on my coffee to cool to a temperature slightly less than the surface of the sun. The flight to Atlanta was uneventful and I met Coby to let me into the Crown Room so that I could watch my Bengals play with a big screen tv and free munchies.

In the airport, I exchanged money to the local currency. Remember that the Colombian peso is roughly 2,400 to 1 in our favor. So at the end of this transaction, I was a millionaire. Very nice. I carefully folded the stack into my now George Constanza wallet and happily strutted off looking down at all the poor peons that until recently were my financial peers.

The flight to Bogota was also uneventful. I learned a couple of tricks from the travel master: (1) Ask at the desk if there is an open row to be reassigned, and (2) sit in the middle seat so that no one else moves up with you... Works like a charm. The movie was one of those few experiences where it makes you appreciate life. Like how you just wasted two hours that you desperately want back...

We arrived and stood in line to get through Customs for about an hour. Outside the airport, there was a mass of people standing there offering taxi rides, etc… It felt good to see my name on a placard with my driver. I will say though that it was nothing like the commercials – it wasn’t a limousine and it wasn’t full of Bud Light. We checked into the hotel and then went out to dinner (10:30 local).
At dinner we looked at the menu and were amazed by the prices. The menu had a hamburger as 8.500. Now for those of you that travel, you probably see where this is going. For the rest of us, with my wallet containing over 1 million pesos, somewhere in the midst of my decision that when I bought the bar I would tear down the adjacent buildings to build a park – I remembered that they use a "." for a "," – so it wasn’t 0.35 cents but rather $3.54. So my hopes for Colombian domination were quickly dashed.

Monday – Wednesday
The office is in the heart of the financial district. Bogota has had trouble with crime and terrorism in the past, but I feel completely safe here. To get into my hotel on foot, you have to pass three security guards. To get into my hotel by car, you have to have the car searched by a guard with a bomb-sniffing dog. To get into the restaurant that is nearby, you have to pass a metal detector. They do not play.

However, what is odd is that after you go over the barriers, through the security checkpoing, badge in through 2 different doors to the office -- you still have to get a key from the receptionist to go to the bathroom.

We are a couple of blocks away from the office and we walk through an open mall. Over the past couple of days we have settled into a routine.
08:00 we call each other for a wake up
08:30 meet in the lobby
08:45 arrive at work
10:30 first smoke break (I remain simply a second-hand smoker)
13:00 lunch in the mall (more about the food later)
14:00 back to work
16:00 smoke break #4
19:00 leave work
20:00 dinner

When we leaave, we go through the grocery store to get the next day's morning breakfast (2 bottle of Diet Coke each). I have been experimenting with the local drinks and have settled on a no calorie Dasani water that is Jamaica flavored (taste likes Cranberries).

Last Day / First Day

2006-09-17T19:13:00.000-04:00

September 1 was my last day with my job. I went to Cincinnati and said a few goodbyes. It was a good day...

Several folks were too busy to really talk. I went to lunch with a former manager (and friend) and my replacement (and friend), and we had lunch like it was any other day. I left work and went for dinner with two good friends Tom & Michelle and they bought it very generously.

There is a going away "roast" for me on Friday the 29th. So maybe I won't have as many kind things to say after that... ;-)

February 10, 1997 to September 1, 2006.

My new job started on Monday the 5th. A new beginning.

Glacier Trip - Part 4b: Guy Trip and a Ryan

2006-08-31T17:47:00.000-04:00

Saturday
We had the best intentions for an early start the next morning. Ryan, who knows me like a brother, was chuckling that I was not stressed out by the timeliness of the trip. Hey – it is vacation and everything is beautiful so why rush anything. That, and the fact that for some reason I was the slow guy for pretty much the rest of the trip.

We eat another wonderful massive breakfast and head over to the Ranger Station to get our campsite reservations. The guys begged me to say that they had all already watched the video. In a moment of significant peer pressure and severe weakness, I conceded. It hurts.

I planned out a trip back to the Belly River area where I had been every year so far – but since we had a limited time I wanted to give these guys the "Greatest Hits" tour. I was hoping to stay the night at Cosley lake (8.5 mile hike), but it was completely booked – which makes three years in a row that I could not stay there.

Year 1 – Closed because of a juvenile grizzly bear frequenting the area
Year 2 – Closed because a horse had killed another horse and so the owner had blown the dead one up with a stick of dynamite. Apparently, if a horse dies out on the trail, the carcass is too large and a bear would hang out there and eat. If they blow it up, then the smaller animals would carry the pieces away. However, this was a "blow up" gone bad and the bears were enjoying the buffet.
Year 3 – Fully booked.

We booked the trip to Glen Lake and then Elizabeth Lake. We would enter at the Canadian border and then my idea was that I would hike the 10.5 miles (800ft climb) back to the car and pick them up – because I was sending them out through Ptarmigan tunnel which is a 10 mile hike but 2500ft up and 2500ft back down. I figured that would teach them to hike faster than me…I had done that hike before I would simply describe it as "spectacularly brutal".

We headed out after filling up on water and got on the trail around noon. We ran into the Ranger around mile 3. He was on his horse (and was leading two others) on his way to pick up his girlfriend. We talked a bit and he told us to stop by his cabin and rest in the shade. We did – and Mike took probably my favorite picture of the trip along his corral. Looking in his window, he had a fish thawing on the counter and a couple bottles of wine open – with candles ready. If this cabin starts a rockin’… An additional note, Tim rated his outhouse the best of the trip. Apparently, there was a nice breeze that blew from underneath that Tim found pleasant after a long hike.

The cabin is 6.2 miles into the trip. We left to have lunch another 1.5 miles away at Gros Ventre falls. My friends from last year will remember that stop as where I forced them to march with limited breaks because we were running so far behind. (They actually still speak to me). The falls were nice, although you can tell that the water is down from the last couple of years. We hiked the last 3 miles from there to camp and my friends got to fishing.

Now it should also be noted that on almost every trip I have taken butter and foil – but no one with me has ever caught a fish. That streak was maintained this evening. Fish Count = 0.

Tim stopped reading his book "Night of the Grizzlies" because he finally got scared. He had left his book "Spectacular Plane Crashes" back in the car so he would have to read that on the flight home.

Sunday
We took the shorter hike with the stream crossing to Elizabeth Lake. The first year, the water was well up my thigh, but this year it was around my knees (although still shockingly cold). We stopped at Dawn Mist falls and then headed over to camp.

We picked a camp because there was a lure there attached to a tree. The guys went out to fish with the lure and it turned out to be the charm. They caught more fish that I could count – but kept 9 to eat. The logic was two apiece, but the 9th was so big that they had to keep it. I guess there is a rule. They had brought oil and spices to cook with – but with my doubts about the fish (in Grizzly country) I had not really brought the right thing to cook it in. We used my aluminum heat shield on the stove – until it melted through after fish #4. We used a rock as the serving dish and picked the meat out with our fingers. The fish was the best of my life. Ryan – I am sorry that I doubted you.

Again, paranoid about the smell – I wouldn’t let anyone sleep in the clothes they wore for that experience. There was some push-back, but with the slightly crazed look I had in my eyes, everyone conceded.

This was also a bit of a switch in sleeping. Mike and I shared a tent – but the campsite was at a slight slant, so Mike did not want to sleep "down hill" so rather than sleeping "head to toe" as I normally encourage, his head was up on my side of the tent. You see, head to toe is great. If only one head is at the end of a tent, (1) you can toss your stuff around., (2) you don’t smell each others breath, and (3) you don’t wake up face to face and scream in the morning because you don’t have your bearings about you and you think you picked up a really really ugly chick from a bar. This is also good for a reason that Mike was soon to discover – because in the middle of the night, with your hat pulled down over your ears and the sleeping bag tightly wrapped around your head – you still cannot block out the volume of my snoring from 12 inches away. Mike’s quote of the trip was "Nicole is a saint".

Monday
We get up the next morning, pack up and head out. Tim generously comes with me and Mike/Ryan head over the river and through the woods to Swift Current Motor Lodge they go. We make it out about (Tim 30 min. earlier) and drive the hour to get to where Mike/Ryan would come out of the woods. They had been there about 10 minutes and we stretched out on the porch letting their feet dry. I asked if it was a good hike and they said it was – and they had seen bears at the end of it.

We paid for showers at the camp site – but this was more of a place for car campers so no towels or soap was provided. So, I bought a bar of Irish Spring and we cut it into four pieces. For Towels, I bought a roll of Bounty that we split. Soon, as clean as a whistle, we headed out to Two Sisters for lunch and PIE. Everyone was full but I required that we order at least one piece – I picked the blueberry peach, which was not a great combination, but it was still pie.

We headed on to our next challenge. Tim’s goal was to see bear. Mission Accomplished. Ryan’s goal was to get away into the woods far from email. Mission Accomplished. Matt’s goal was to set up a great trip. Mission Accomplished. Mike's goal? Make it out of the woods in time to get to a sports bar to watch the Bengals’ pre-season game. Mission soon to be accomplished.

We headed into Whitefish which was an awesome little town and found what turned out to be the local blue collar hang out. Which was also full of Green Bay fans (who the Bengals beat like a drum). No fights but the locals got even because the greasy food we ate made the game of rock/scissors/paper for the bathrooms a little more aggressive.

Tuesday
I got up around 4:30 to take Ryan to the airport and came back for the guys. Ryan (and then Nicole) had coached through getting an earlier flight and so we all then could fly out around the same time. The security at Kalispell seemed a little lax – so Mike dared me to see if I could run through it. He even offered to yell a long war whoop as I ran through the metal detector. My blister on my foot was bothering me, so I passed.

Mike also had access to the Crown Room at the airport in Salt Lake – which is awesome. We arrived in Cincinnati, Nicole grabbed us at the door. We gave Mike a quick ride home. Trip Complete.

Glacier Trip - Part 4a: Guy Trip

2006-08-31T17:44:00.000-04:00

Tuesday
We drive the 1 1/2 hours back from the airport for Nicole and to pick up Mike. There is some debate about the choice of location for that night -- but it isn't like the scenery was horrible to view... Mike arrives with no luggage, but it turns out his luggage beat him here... All is well... We are pumped about our next day.

Wednesday
The next morning after the wonderful Glacier breakfast buffet, Tim takes the long and winding road back to the airport (and back) to drop Christie off. Our goal is to get a route with the ranger better than my original plan. With Ryan coming now on Friday, we have broken the trip into two three-day trips.

Around noon, I go wandering over to the Ranger Station (no car) but it is closed. Tim gets back about the same time that I do, so we go back as I thought I saw an official looking vehicle drive up. The truck was driven by what turned out to be a local Ski Legend who works doing trail maintenance in the summer. He takes us down to the closest Ranger Station at Two Medicine.

Having skipped the Two Medicine trip last year, I scheduled us to go to No Name Lake and then on to Upper Two Medicine Lake. None of the hiking was going to be really hard, we were going to cover about 20 miles and only about 800 feet of elevation gain.

I was a little concerned that Tim and Mike did not take the safety video as seriously as I would have liked. This was to be a scary trend that would cause me great stress and agony. You must understand that when you hike in Grizzly country that you have to be very careful. They eat you. I, being ever so slightly risk adverse, make sure that anything with odor is carefully hung 200 yards away from our tents. The next few days would be an exercise in patience -- yes, we must hang the toothpaste -- yes, we that Powerbar wrapper has to be hung. As well, as we were comfortably about to fall asleep in our sleeping bags, I hear Tim from the next tent ask "Does anyone want any of these potato chips?" Mike responds "No, I am too stuffed from this can of Mackerel -- I can't eat it all so I will just leave it out here for later." I sob myself to sleep.

Thursday
The next morning we climb up to the glacier nearby that was too difficult to reach the evening before in our sandals. The glacier is inside a huge bowl of rocks that have been pushed out over time to build a 50-60 ft. wall. Mike and Tim play a game of throwing small boulders back into the bowl, trying to knock over piles of rocks. We decide that the area has now been primarily shaped by the ice age and the Tim/Mike/Matt trip of 2006.

Oh
Fish Count -- 0
Bear Count -- 7
Animals Mike has seen -- a crow, 5 squirrels, and a duck

We pack up and head on down to Upper Two Medicine Lake. It is a short hike today so that there is plenty of time to fish. We hear on the trail that there is a Moose (from Americans, so it didn't count) at the campsite so we hurry on.

The tents were hot last night, so Tim leaves his rainfly off so that it would guarantee some rain. 11 hours and a damp Tim later, the rain stops.

Friday
Earlier, we had run into two guys from Miami that were pretty much newbies when it comes to backpacking. Now I will say that when I started, I read a bunch of books but really did learn a lot from logic and experience. These guys -- not so much. First -- no rain gear. That would get them voted out of the tribe immediately. Second -- all cotton. In my humble opinion, unless it is a flannel sheet -- cotton is the devil. It gets wet and doesn't insulate and won't dry and... sorry I am getting too worked up... ANYWAY, these guys were cold, wet and almost hypothermic. We gently coached them to skip the rest of the trip and get out of the woods. They did.

We hiked out of the woods and Mike jogged to get the car. We drove the 1/2 hour back to East Glacier (with the windows completely rolled down) to go to the perfect combination of a Laundry and Shower store thing. For 1.50/pound they would do our laundry, which we thought was more than worth not having to touch our underwear again. For about $5 or so -- we got 8.5 minutes of hot shower. There were only two showers available, so I lost rock/paper/scissors and got to go third.

I then drive Mike/Tim back 1 1/2 hours to the Many Glacier Lodge and drop them off at the bar. I head the 2 hours back to the airport (grabbing our clean laundry on the way) to pick up Ryan (I was 1 1/2 hours late) and we meet the guys back at the lodge.

Fish Count -- 0
Bear Count -- 11 (Grizzly and Black Bear repeats)

Glacier Trip - Part 3: Vacation with the Mrs. (and Tim and Christie)

2006-08-30T17:04:00.000-04:00

Saturday
Our new flight leaves very early the next morning. We arrive in Kalispell at 1:15 which essentially makes us lose a day in the park. However we aren't upset at all until we hear about all that we missed with the Super 8.

Tim & Christie pick us up and we head to the park. We stop at Lake McDonald Lodge for some pictures and then head through the middle of the park on the "Going to the Sun" road to the East Glacier Lodge. The views are spectacular.

Tim's goal was to see a bear and had been a little disillusioned by a kid working at the Kalispell outfitter that said "I have lived here all my life and have never seen a bear." So it was nice that on the road across the park we saw a mother black bear and two cubs. Bear count = 3.

Sunday (My birthday if you want to get me something. On my wish list there is still a Rolex and a Ferrari, surprisingly enough.)

We went into Canada to see the Prince William Lodge and for a hike to Lower Bertha Falls. The Lodge had availability, but at $250 USD/night we were happy to stay in the US.

The hike was long and with good rolling hills that definitely trended upward. The falls were nice at the top -- we tagged the rock and headed back down. Unfortunately, this "easy" hike caused the group to stop trusting me and requiring a book check for all future hikes.

We had lunch in a little cafe while I tried to work on my sunburn. We then headed back through the incredibly polite US Customs (really, it was -- although there was some questions about why Christie was with Tim).

On the drive back, we saw a grizzly mom with two cubs and a juvenile black bear. Bear count is now 7.

Dinner was at the lodge. The place is run by temporary help mostly from Eastern Europe. Tim and I had a little side game going trying to get the Russian staff to say "Moose and Squirrel". He kicked my butt.

The other thing that was Tim with his restaurant background was constantly asking "How do you prepare this..." or "How do you prepare that..." Yet when asking about the Elk, he asked the waitress "Elk, how do you pronounce that?" She gave us a very confused look and carefully said "Eeeellllllkkk". Nicole and Christie were on the floor.

Monday
Today we went to the center of the park for the requisite Hidden Lake trail. It is a very steep hike, but mostly on board walkways. We were struggling at one point, only to look over and see a guy that had to be 120 years old with an oxygen mask. Needless to say, we sucked it up and hiked on. The great thing about this hike is that there is so much wildlife -- no moose, but a lot of squirrel.... ...and moutain goats, and big horn sheep. The view is spectacular and unlike anything else in the park.

I made everyone eat at Two Sisters and then follow it up with pie at the Park City Cafe (Pies for Strength!). We then went on to Apikuni (Trick) falls and to the Two Medicine area. We finished with day with a good dinner and got Nicole ready to fly out on Tuesday...

Tuesday
Ryan is out. I call Mike and he says Ryan is in. We verify on the way to the airport and we have to unpack Nicole's suitcase to get the tent and other things for Ryan out. We take a casual day and come back to pick up Mike late that night.

Glacier Trip - Part 2: Revenge of Delta

2006-08-30T16:56:00.000-04:00

I wanted Nicole to come along as well -- 1) because she is nice to have around, 2) if she ends up liking it, I get to come more. We are to fly out of Cincinnati (cheaper oddly) on Friday night. Tim brings along his wife as well, with Nicole and Christie flying back prior to the guy trip.

Here are a couple of definitions:
Couple Trip -- short trip involving good food and lodging
Guy Trip -- smelly trips involving dehydrated food and tents

Friday, 4:00 -- We arrive in Cincinnati to have air blasted up our clothes to check for bomb air particles. We pass. The X-ray off my bags look interesting however as I have a row of empty canisters (Nalgene bottles) sitting next to some sort of fuel injected device (camping stove). After a very pleasant conversation, we move on.
Friday. 6:00 -- Ryan sees Tim & Christie and says "See you in a week". He is in.
Friday, 6:05 -- Ryan calls me. He is out. I make plans to sent the now unneeded tent back with Nicole.
Friday, 6:10 -- flight delayed to 6:45. No worries, we have a very long layover in Minneapolis.
Friday, 6:45 -- flight delayed to 7:30. Some nervousness, frustration setting in
Friday, 7:30 -- we get on the plane, but the air conditioner is out. They fix it in 30 minutes, but at this point the pilots have been on duty too long and can no longer fly. Since they didn't call anyone until it was too late, we lose another 1/2 hour for them to get another team here.
Friday, 9:25 -- We miss our connection in Minneapolis and Delta puts us up in a very nice Holiday Inn Select.

Meanwhile in Montana:
After paging Nicole in Minneapolis (apparently there was no concern for me -- after all, she is the cute one), Tim & Christie arrive in Kalispell and check their voicemail to find out what is going on since we were supposed to be on the same flight from Minnesota. I leave directions for the car rental and the reserved hotel.

Note to Kalispell vacationers... Here is some information that my AAA book left out (on accident, I am sure). The "Airport" Super 8 has a few nice features:
1) You don't have to worry about the noise of airplanes as it is nowhere near the airport.
2) If you need a drink, there is a conveniently located biker bar not 30 feet away from your first floor window
3) The rooms will make you appreciate every other place you will stay for the rest of the trip (including the tent in the rain).
4) You will be safe as the police protection seemed to rotate in and out throughout the night.
5) It is well ventilated as the smokers from the next door non-smoking room is easily blown over directly to your non-smoking room.

However, the attendant was very kind in not charging me for my room through the great negotiations of Tim.

I am just sorry that I missed it...

Glacier Trip - Part 1: Casting

2006-08-30T16:23:00.000-04:00

This is going to be the first in a series of several posts -- that build from previous entries on planning. Here are the highlights to catch you up.

In December or January (it was chilly, that is all I remember), at a company holiday party I was talking to Tim, the husband of another Project Manager, about hiking trips. As the night wore on, I said we should go. A couple of other colleagues (friends from other trips) signed on as well. We were in.

Fast forward to August and everyone is still verbally confirmed with a couple of slight complications...

Complication 1: Ryan gets promoted to a very very senior position with the company. Our orignal plan of putting this vacation back to back with another vacation is in jeopardy as time off for him gets even more difficult. Ryan thinks that he is 90% sure he is in.

Complication 2: Mike starts his own company with a couple of other guys and it is difficult for him to get away with two young kids and a wife with her own business.

Complication 3: Tim gets promoted and is new in the position.

Complication 4: Matt quits his job (to take a new one) and realizes that everyone else is in much better shape than he is -- and is nervous about about being the slowest and plumpest member of the group.

Mid-August arrives and 3 of 4 have plane tickets... We are getting close.

Packing for three trips

2006-08-17T21:07:00.000-04:00

Okay -- so logically I just take one car to one plane and arrive (after one layover) at one destination. However, I don't seem to be packing for *that* trip.

Trip 1
Evenings at a restaurant, all scrubbed clean and shaven, is dinner with friends. Jeans and maybe if I am feeling more preppy than my roots I might add a shirt with a collar. Counting the plane rides, I have six of those nights...

Trip 2
Day hiking with the Mrs... Nicer hiking clothing, maybe even the tennis shoes on days I don't feel like the heavy boots. No shower before we start, but still relatively clean.

Trip 3
Backpacking with the boys. No showers and no change of underwear -- in fact, if the boxers don't hike on their own by the end of the trip I don't think that we did it right.

Trip 3, while it may make you re-taste your breakfast just thinking about it, is still the hardest to pack and prepare as if you forget something here, it is at least a 10 mile hike and then a drive to go get it (and then a drive and 10 mile hike back). Forgetting is forgivable, but not fortuitous. Fortunately, I generally remember everything small, usually leaving out only the minor items like a "tent" or "stove".

Trip 2 is the odd man out. If I pack for trip 1 with extras, it is covered -- but as I am bringing along said "Mrs.", I want to look nice. After all, I do need to eventually talk this woman into the process, or at least the concept and idea of the baby-making enterprise. Sticking with the trip 3 fashion wear would automatically delay this 6-7 months.

A few loose ends...

2006-08-15T22:14:00.000-04:00

Next Trip
Friday we leave for Glacier. Nicole is coming with me on Friday to rough it in the lodges with me until Tuesday. The guys are arriving on Friday, Wednesday and Friday which makes for some interesting logistics -- but we are going to have an incredible time.

18 Month Plan
For work, we are working on:
- two weeks to Colombia (Bogata) in September
- two weeks to Switzerland (Geneva) in October
- two weeks to Switzerland (Geneva) in November

which, I found out today, for my new role is practice for the literally 25-30 weeks I will spend next year in Europe. It looks like I will be gone completely January and June - September, with a multitude of two week trips peppered in from February - May. My primary developer is moving to Europe for 9 months.

Job
I have not been really able to talk about it, but I quit my job effective end of the month (45 days notice) to start September 5th with this new gig. I am almost done saying goodbye to all of my mentors, colleagues, and peeps -- but it has not been easy. 9 1/2 years is just a long time.

House Plans
This travel definitely affects when we can get a new house. I am going to scramble to get everything ready for December, but in all likelihood we will try to sell in February on our own -- and if that doesn't work, hire a realtor for March.

You can't go home again

2006-08-15T21:45:00.000-04:00

...or at least you can not bring any liquids, gels or relaxation back with you.

We got up Friday morning much too early. Luckily, since I had the only suitcase with an echo -- all of my stuff fit fine. The two glass bottles of tequila were safely wrapped in clothing in the middle of my suitcase. My products of evil (toothpaste, shampoo, sunscreen) were safely left for the hotel staff. We were ready to go.

My manager fared just as well as I did using an interesting approach to package his wine. He pulls the bottles into a (slightly used) sock. Apparently this adds to the bouquet.

Being the designated paranoid travel, the DPT, I was a bit stressed that we did not leave at 10 as I had planned. So, rounding up folks at 10:02 -- we finally left around 10:45. It took a while to get to the border crossing, and since we were locked in line we had to turn off the air conditioning just to guarantee that we could make it. My manager, with his wily ways, had positioned the car so that the sun was beating down on me. However, I don't blame him for the lack of wind. As you would expect, this was the only hot day with no rain.

We made it to the border and the guard was unimpressed with his Frenchness and asked a lot of questions. He asked me a couple of things to verify my KY accent of which I did my best to oblige (Hoo-Wee). He asked if we had cigarettes, drugs or alcohol -- and since we had 6 bottles in the car we were sent to a building with a flashing light. Nervous that they were going to search our entire bags, we drove over (mainly just nervous about flight times, not that someone would be caught with some lotion or other dangerous contraband). However, they just wanted to have us pay a tax.

The guard asked to see the bottles. I asked if he was serious. He said yes, that he was. I asked him what the maximum tax was -- I would just pay that. He said no. I looked pleadingly. He got out a rubber glove and a smile. I dug into my suitcase and produced both bottles. Total charge per bottle $1.25. No cavity search, priceless.

We made it to the airport about an hour prior to the flight just as the gas tank read "Low". Perfect timing as only 1/2 of my face had already melted away.

There was no one in line for security and the detailed check was "Do you have any liquids?" I said "No". They said "Are you sure?" I said "Yes." That will fool them. You can just see it... "Dang, you asked me twice -- I must tell the truth!"

Flights were uneventful. I did nervously watch someone mix a drink, but it turned out to not be explosive.

Sunny Delight

2006-08-12T23:18:00.000-04:00

Wednesday in Juarez
Today it did not rain until around 2 -- and then only enough to continue the streak.

Training continued acceptably. We had some executive requirements review -- and then went on to have dinner with the plant manager at a local steakhouse.

At the restaurant, the waiter seated us and then asked us how we liked our salsa. There was a guy that would come to the table with a big mortar & pestle and several bowls of ingredients. My boss said "Medium", which in Spanish is very similar to the English word "Molten". The server actually asked when we said Medium if we would prefer that he go light on the Habenero peppers. There was no sweating with this salsa. There was simply a tingle followed by pain.

Loss of manly points by bursting into tears and begging the "bad man to stop" -- 50.

Thursday
We wrapped up the majority of training today and I was able to get in a bit of programming (which is not something I do more than once or twice a year). The team wanted to take us out to dinner to a local restaurant named "Frida's" after the famous painter.

Dinner was very good. For the appetizers, we had cucumbers & jalepenos in a mild sauce and a wonderful combo platter that included the fried famous Menonite cheese. I had a steak with a wonderful brandied gravy and au gratin potatoes. After the gorging completed, the team generously gave us a huge box of local foods and flavors of Mexico -- and a bottle each of tequila. Way too genorous.

After dinner, three of us (or at least two of them including my ride) decided to go next door to a dance club. There was a great live band (as opposed to a dead band, I guess) and the ratio of women to men was at least 60-40. I am thinking that this isn't so bad afterall. So ignoring the packing challenges that loom ahead between the terrorist limitations and the addition of these wonderful gifts -- we go on.

Now it should have been clear to me that a large ratio of women to men is not a natural occurrence in any culture or country. If there are a lot of women, there is always a lot of men unless there is one determining factor soon to be made appararent.

The band completed and a guy came out into what I thought was an oddly unpopulated area in the middle of the floor. We, I had wrongly thought conveniently, had a great seat next to the dance floor. Please picture the change in facial expressions.
1) Seconds 0-5 Me smiling and enjoying the scenery and live music.
2) Seconds 6-9 Oddly confused at why the women are crowding towards the stage
3) Second 10 Horror as his shirt comes off. I realize I am now experiencing a Mexican strip show

Three dancers later, after couning the number of tiles in the opposite wall -- the show is over. The locals go to dance to the techno Spanish music and we leave around 1 a.m.

Cantinas, Cathedrals and Culture -- Oh, My!

2006-08-12T22:33:00.000-04:00

Monday
The morning brings an early day. I met my boss for breakfast and we went on to the plant for the training session. We got through the security checks, etc... and everyone rolled it to get started about 8:30. The day went pretty well and it was a good group of folks. I only get 2 days with this team, so we definitely are going for the highlights (only). For dinner, Armida took us out again. She rocks.

Logistically, it was going to take too long for her to go home to change and then come back across the city to meet us for dinner. So instead, we dropped our stuff off at the hotel -- and since my laundry had not returned (they had my jeans and cargo pants) I went for the overdressed look -- and then went to her house for her to change clothes. It was good to see a real home -- and her parents were very open and generous to us.

We left her house to go see her brother at his liquor store (I had mentioned that I wanted to find a World Cup Mexico hat like hers and her brother sold some). He gave us the hats for free, so I overpaid for some locally made liquor to give as a present. We then went to the cantina that her father owns and her brother bartends during the day. It was incredibly cool. This leads to a story that may divide her family for years... Some background...

Apparently, in Mexico the cantina was a refuge for the men. Some years ago, when women were allowed(?) to work, they were also allowed into the cantinas. (I can somewhat recognize the equation work=need to drink). However, her father had never encouraged this practice in HIS cantina. He is old school.

Armida had been in the cantina once when she was 10 years old when she and some cousins skipped Mass and shot pool. Her father had not spoken to her for a month.

Now fast forward 26 years. Armida is now 36 and for the first time since childhood, steps foot into the cantina and -- wait for it -- orders a drink. The brother hesitates as if looking at the clock and calculating the time it would take for her to drink her tequila and doing some mental calisthenics to factor in the safety zone between finish time and the ETA of said Old School Father. She was like a kid in a candy store. Even if this hadn't been one of the truly coolest bars I have ever seen -- this was fun to watch.

We then went on to have a great dinner out on a patio downtown. Chihuahua is a great city.

Tuesday
Training went as well today as yesterday. We had a good time until the speed of some of the applications in the training room had us end a little early.

The group wanted to take us out to see the city. We had passed a cathedral (apparently famous) of which I wanted to take a few pictures. We drove there and while I rushed on to get a few pictures while the sunlight was on my side -- Herve and Armida waited for the other group to park. In the list of the top 100 decisions I have made in the last month, this somehow would not have made the cut.

So as I wandered the three blocks to the cathedral, a less than sober/sane/wealthy local stumbled past me, muttering and rapping at me in Spanish. (So far, not all that different than a day at the office or in any other city). Then he picked up a brick.

Now imagine that all this passed through my mind in a single flash. Crazy guy. Brick. 10 karate lessons. 1,000 watched karate movies. I literally looked him in the eye and considered doing that little "C'mon" wave from the Matrix. Then, luckily, he dropped his brick and stumbled on.

Now this person was no different than the poor in any American city or any other city in the world. Chihuahua was an amazingly beautiful, clean and pedestrian friendly city. I loved it -- this story was only a typical travel day for me.

The Cathedral was gorgeous. We wandered over to a wedding dress shop to see a local story where the mannequin was famously designed after the owner's daughter (or that was as much as I understood of the story). We then meandered over to a city park where every night they have live music and choreographed lights and fountains for a great Bellagio-esque show. Dinner was in a great Chinese restaurant (I had sweet & sour duck).

Wednesday in Chihuahua
We unfortunately had to leave the beautiful city -- and 350km, a couple of tolls and a military checkpoint later -- arrived back in Juarez for training.

Play that funky music, Gringo

2006-08-08T16:39:00.000-04:00

For the drive to Copper Canyon and back, I sat in the back seat so that Armida could give directions. Unforeseen in this decision was the associated impact to music selection for our eight or so hours in the car. Let's just say that it was really odd when (around hour 7) she switched to an English station (it took about 1/2 way through the song before I realized that it wasn't that I suddenly understood Spanish, but that they had not translated Queen's Bohemian Rhapsody").

Our friends were very good though about helping us understand the language, culture and history of what we were seeing throughout the drive --like we passed the area where most of the US/Mexican apples are grown. We drove through towns and villages, each with their own culture. Since it rains so little here (cough), the girls were very excited about a massive and beautiful double rainbow that appeared on our way back.

The Indians at the top of the canyon were interesting. They were weaving baskets there not so much for show, but rather to pass the time and get the work done. For the most part, they kept to themselves. There were some interesting food selections of which I chose not to partake -- but it all smelled very good. The picture does not do it justice, but the tacos here in the open air market smelled wonderful.

Copper Canyon

2006-08-07T01:14:00.000-04:00

Surprisingly it rained today.

We drove about 2 hours to Creel and had lunch. Creel is kind of like the touristy shop part of Gatlinburg merged with Mexican culture. I had some chicken tacos and on the request of my sister, had some Mexican hot chocolate (as she had heard it was something different). So, Melinda, Mexican hot chocolate is very good. I watched them open a packet of Nestle Hot Chocolate and pour it and boiling water into the cup. So I can honestly say it is just like Mom used to make.

We then drove another 2 hours to Copper Canyon to see the rain clouds. We stopped in the hotel (picture taken after the rain) and sat in the bar area on a great couch with a big picture window of the canyon (the bar area was the two right most windows).

One of the locals was kind enough to show us the way. She (Armida) had brought one of her friends (Monica) -- their drinks were (1) tequila and grapefruit juice and (2) beer and tomato juice on ice. I am not sure where to start with the second one as it seems wrong on each ingredient level.

More on this trip (funny stories) in the next post.

Caption Contest

2006-08-07T01:01:00.000-04:00

This picture deserves its own posting and really should be a contest for the best caption. There are several drive-thru liquor stores that we saw on the way to/from Copper Canyon -- and Armida saw this happening and made us stop to get a picture. Here are my ideas:

"Look officer, the horse hasn't had a thing to drink"
"Um, is there such a thing as RUI?"
"Designated Drivers are sooo over-rated"

Okay, so I was wrong...

2006-08-07T00:36:00.000-04:00

Some of the few, the proud, the folks with bigger SUVs -- decided to take us out anyway. We went to a place called "Viva Mexico" where there was a cultural show of dancers, mariachis, lasso twirler guys, and a really funny comedian that dragged one of our American guys on stage and had him dance. He was a great sport -- so much so that since I captured it all on video, I have promised that what happens in Juarez, stays in Juarez. (I could see it coming with the show and hid behind the table.)

We conducted the training on Friday and headed for El Paso. This border crossing took about an hour and a half to get to the border, but once we did it was pretty easy to get across. We have to remember to stop at an extra location to get stamped for our final departure. We had planned to go to one of the most famous Steak houses in the US, but the interstate was closed due to flooding. Our second choice had flooded twice (although according to the only guy at the restaurant -- he was cleaning -- we could make it there, just there would be nothing to serve). Our third choice was a seafood place a mile away -- and it was really good.

The next morning I met my boss at the airport and we headed across the border after grabbing a couple items at the local mall. I found out later that today was a tax free shopping day which explains why we literally had to park over a mile away. The border was relatively easy to cross again. (We saw someone else struggling through the situation where they had not been stamped). We had gotten the right insurance for the Mexican government -- but we had to stop and get a permit, go through 2 tolls and a military checkpoint to get through to Chihuahua.

Since this was the desert, there were only two times that it rained so hard we had to turn on the emergency blinkers and slow to about 30 mph. The rest of the time it just drizzled. I will say that time seems to go faster with kph over mph. The numbers count down much quicker.

We met one of our colleagues for dinner -- I had the best meal so far, a pepper stuffed with meat, potatoes, grapes, and almonds and it had a white gravy with pomegranite seeds. Chihuahua is a really beautiful city.

Here are a couple of images from the weather forecast.

Rain, rain, go away

2006-08-03T19:28:00.000-04:00

We are at the end of the training day (Thursday) and our plans to go out to dinner with the complete team have been cancelled. Apparently additional storms and flash flood warnings seem to have "dampened" the spirt of adventure.

The training today went "okay". We got started late today (10:30) because of the floods -- so my 7 hours, down to 6 hours, down to 3.5 hours went relatively quickly. I was averaging a slide a minute -- with a focus tomorrow on doing more hands on to bring it all together.

We are in a training room in the middle of the manufacturing plant. To keep the workers occupied, they blast music throughout the plant. While we are two closed doors away from the plant, you can definitely still hear it. I threatened the other day to start shaking my hips along with Shakira (I was asked by the class "Please don't). It also was interesting to have one of them whistle the main bass line from Queen's "Another One Bites the Dust" while I was having application issues. I have always said that my life needs theme music.

Oh the sunburn...

2006-08-03T11:08:00.000-04:00

Today was less rain compared to earlier in the week. We actually got to see a spot of sun, which according to local legend is somewhat common in the desert. I am not sure that I believe it. The forecast for Juarez is the following:

August 2 -- Scattered Thunderstorms
August 3 -- Scattered Thunderstorms
August 4 -- Isolated Thunderstorms
August 5 -- Isolated Thunderstorms
August 6 -- Isolated Thunderstorms
August 7 -- Isolated Thunderstorms
August 8 -- Isolated Thunderstorms
August 9 -- Isolated Thunderstorms
August 10 -- Mostly Sunny
August 11 -- Mostly Sunny, and we leave

I attempted to do some training today, but the application we are working on died. It gave an error when I logged in that I have found to be the most truthful of any application ever. It read "Horrible Error" with a undescriptive description of the issue. I have to admit that I agree. I am training folks having traveled across the border and I am embarrased that it doesn't work -- so it is a "Horrible Error". I appreciate the honesty.

I found out later that the company that hosts the tool was having trouble with their internet service provider until about 15 minutes after we finished. I don't know if anyone has ever taken a class where the instructor was basically forced to teach from the user's manual -- but it is somewhat less than captivating. I did get to show off the main features however, so not all is lost.

For lunch we ate at the cafeteria -- and they had chili dogs and fries. It is the simple things in life that make me happy. To top it off -- for our training room snack they served Hostess Twinkies and Ding Dongs. While I did refrain, I was tempted by the twinkie -- since they were out of the fried twinkies at the last Red's game I attended.

For dinner, one of the students/new hires took us to a local mall. We ate in the food court at a local favorite fast food chain. Kathy and I split between two orders of chicken and pork tacos which were served with a baked potato (with real butter, very nice) and a soda. I was all proud of my grasp of Spanish fast food so I approached the counter and had the following exchange:

Me: Buenos Dias
Server: Buenos Dias (she understood me, so far so good)
Me: Taco Tote Pack, Pollo
Server: Ok. Taco Tote Pack Pollo (got my chicken taco combo meal order, so far so good)
Me: Si, Gracias
Server: Long sentence in Spanish (uh oh)
Me: Um, uh, um
Server: (Pointing to Soda Fountain)
Me: Oh (cursing in English) um, "Coke Light" (Diet Coke)
Server: Long Sentence in Spanish (hmmm, this isn't going well)
Me: Here is a $20
Server: Long Sentence in Spanish (apparently she can only give me change in Pesos, which I want -- but our "guide" wouldn't let me pay)
Me: (I step out of the way, humbly)

I will say that I was better prepared when I went back to the counter and got (wonderful) Flan for dessert (go with what works -- point at what you want, hold up the appropriate number of fingers, hand over a sum of money). I got my change (she gave me dollars and pesos) and I repaid our guide. We wandered around the mall for a bit and then left so that Kathy could make her 9:30 call with China.

Hector and I sat at the hotel bar for a couple of hours and talked sports, movies and the other "no no's" for international conversations -- religion and politics. It was a good time and good to bond with a colleague that I probably will not see face to face for a very long time. It rained all night apparently, so we are late getting started on Thursday as some people are flooded in and are being "rescued" by folks in the larger SUVs. Gotta love this desert weather.

Updates

2006-08-02T09:38:00.000-04:00

None of us can get connected to the network -- so no email/work is possible. The plant is closed until 9, so we could have slept in or at least I could have if I had answered the phone call that I hazily remember hearing in my Tylenol PM stupor last night.

Here is a picture from our underwater adventures. This is the intersection in front of our hotel.

Desert Rain

2006-08-01T23:58:00.000-04:00

So let me remind my dear readers that I am in Juarez, which is located in the middle of the desert. Apparently, every fifty years or so there is a big rain... ...and the last one was, oh, about 50 years ago. So, this week, we have gotten more rain in the area than has ever been measured in Juarez in recorded history (we just surpassed the record set in 1881). I am not making this up. There have been walls of water on the streets and bridges/roads have collapsed... ...and it is not going to stop raining until this weekend.

Today started relatively uneventfully. I got up at 4:30 (6.5 hours of sleep) and got prepped for the day. I had a 6:30 conference call with Lexington/Cincinnati/France that seemed to have happened successfully without me as I could not dial in from Mexico. This same number and approach worked at 5, but not at 6:30 in the morning. Sigh.

We took the shuttle in and got there through the puddles/rivers/streams by 7:30 or so. They had breakfast there for us with fresh papaya. This is how every day should start. We went through the training and broke for lunch (same roughly as yesterday). We then restarted the training on our Spend Analysis tool and were really cranking through it.

At least we were doing well until the stressed out head of HR came in to tell us that the plant was being evacuated due to the rain. Apparently the sewer systems were filling with the sand/water and the plant could potentially flood. We were to leave immediately. So one of the managers had a large SUV and took us back around roadblocks, flooded streets and traffic to get us back to the hotel. For the first time, I had a chance to work out.

Dinner was relatively uneventful. I do think that I could make it a profession though to travel around the world and rewrite the English in menus. I ordered a puff pastry that came out as toast. I like toast almost as well as puff pastry -- but they are a bit tough to confuse.

So a nice end to the day -- and we will see tomorrow if we get to go to work.

Holy Mole

2006-08-01T07:46:00.000-04:00

C'mon, you knew that I had to title at least one blog with that.

So it is raining in Mexico. Maybe it doesn't sound that unusual that in the middle of the desert it is raining. Maybe it doesn't seem odd that the streets are flooded and on some of the roads there is standing water almost a foot in depth. I would only assume that if you didn't think it was odd, it was because you had traveled with me before and know that the rainy season follows my travels. Unbelievable. Not that the rain is bad exactly, it is a constant rain that has definitely cooled everything off and cleaned up the air. I think that the high yesterday was 83. Not bad at all.

We needed to be at the office at 7:30 in preparation for the training. To make our commute to the office, we then needed to leave at 7, so breakfast was scheduled 6:15. Of course, breakfast doesn't open until 6:30. So to get up, iron (someone please check on Nicole -- she probably just read that and fell out of her chair), check email, etc... that was a start at 5. Since this is going to be a typical day, I definitely am NOT going to get adjusted to the time zone and go to bed by 9:30. Regardless, I woke up at 4 (even having taken a Tylenol PM) -- so all was fine.

Breakfast was interesting. As we start out each trip we get adventourus and then quickly ease back into our morning stupor and go back to the comfort and simplicity of toast and coffee. I had enchilada casserole?, steamed vegatables and coffee. Without a Spanish/English dictionary that was as far as I would go.

Our ride was a bit late so we were trying to drive faster to the office through the flooded streets. It turned out that it didn't matter as the VP that was kicking us off was stuck in traffic and wasn't able to make it until 9. We adjusted our training to finish on time in the morning with a lot of "We will talk about that later this week".

Lunch at the site is at the cafeteria (free) where I used my exquisite language skills to point and grunt at what I wanted. I got flautas and rice. Everything was good -- just a bit embarrassing as the flautas were spicy enough that my whole head was sweating. Just in case anyone was wondering on this trip -- yes, my sinuses are completely clear.

The afternoon was 1x1 with folks on the tools and strategies. The team is pretty smart and while we are teaching what you should/must do -- there is a lot of push back in what people "really" do. However, I think we made some good connections. The team oddly mainly remembers me as the guy that ordered the frog legs -- and wants to take me to some restaurant later this week that serves them.

We left work about 6:30 and went to dinner. I debated all sorts of menu items -- there is this "Black Bass" that keeps appearing on the menu that I think is interesting. I went exotic and had Tacos. They were good, but they serve you the fillings on a plate with a stack of corn tortillas more like we get fajitas. Cecilia got a vegatarian enchilada with mole that was awesome. For dessert, we had Crepas which is like a unfilled crepe with a cooked milk (kind of like caramel) and minced pecans in the sauce. Very good.

My phone worked for exactly 10 seconds. We were driving and at some point the clouds, roads and signals aligned -- and I got two text messages from Sunday. Any other time I tried the phone, it would simply ring and then I got a recorded message yelling at me in Spanish.

Mexico

2006-07-31T12:59:00.000-04:00

The flight to El Paso was uneventful. However, for the sake of travel tradition, the train at the Dallas airport broke down for a few minutes so I would feel more at home. Cecilia and her husband were waiting for us at the airport. I was a bit concerned that we wouldn't have enough room in their car for all of our luggage, but they recognized the overage of American materialism and brought the Suburban.

To go into another completely hypothetical situation, suppose that the border might have proved to be slightly problematic. Not to point fingers, but we might have had an issue where one of us that had been to Mexico, had left without getting her passport stamped and was going to owe approximately $4,000 in back charges. (Note to self: Either get stamped leaving Mexico or don’t ever come back.) If this completely hypothetical situation might have happened, I imagine that to deal with it we would have potentially needed to have our “guide” use a lot of Spanish along with hand gestures and pleading. However, in the spirit of what seems to keep happening in this blog, let me embellish the story as of course this would never happen in reality -- there might have been some exchange of funds that seemed to ease the process and we passed on without much incident.

We checked into the hotel (nice) and went for a traditional Chihuahua meal. We went to a place with the same name as the ranch in Bonanza, which was covered with the heads and bodies of exotic animals from around the world that the owner had hunted and killed. (From hippos to lions, leopards to crocodiles). We had a lot of great food that I would misspell. We had a cheese with peppers and sausage in real tortillas. (The tortillas were a great corn instead of flour). We had wonderfully flavored steak, with guacamole, and enchiladas.

We also learned some key Mexican terminology:
Mild or Might be Spicy = Hot
A Little Spicy = Very Hot

There was also another term called “Spicy” of which I am unsure of the translation as it made it to my vicinity only to burn my nose hair. I did not try “Spicy”.

After dinner, we went to a Mexico City style ice cream place where I had flower ice cream and rose petal ice cream. My lovely wife had been talking about the ice cream for as long as I have known her (7 years) – and it was good to finally have some.

Extreme Business

2006-07-29T10:59:00.000-04:00

This Sunday I head off to Juarez and Chihuahua, in the state of Chihuahua, Mexico. It is only logical as that I have traveled to China in monsoon season that I go to Mexico in the heat of summer. It would also be funny (if it were not true) to talk of my plans for a trip to Geneva, Switzerland this winter. If they try to send me the Middle East, I may start to get a bit suspicious that there is a larger messaage they are trying to convey.

I don't think that I will get to do too much locally as I am one of two trainers for all of our applications -- so while I have worked to prep prior, I am sure that the nights before I will be reworking the slides from all of the other sources to match my conversation flow.

Regardless, I look forward to some good Mexican food.

Loose ends...

2006-07-29T10:21:00.000-04:00

A few loose ends from the canoe trip...

A mouse got into our gear. We had packed all the perishables into the cooler, but had left a freezer bag full of energy bars in plastic bin with the lid on. I had also left my waterproof hat out sitting on top of my knife and box of waterproof matches. The mouse got into the bin (impressive), ate a hole into the plastic freezer bag and sampled two of the energy bars -- choosing one mint mocha and one apple crisp. Apparently, these bars were so tasty that he then decided instead to eat the cover off the waterproof matches. I find this funny in that my wife would probably also choose to eat cardboard over the energy bars I eat.

When we got to the end, there was a family playing in the water with a beagle that went crazy when we glided by. He jumped in the water and started to swim after us. My assumption is that canoe is somewhat slower that chasing cars -- so we were a better target.

As a testament to the canoe, we didn't have to scoop much water until a great rapid at the end where we went through with little problem until a drop of about 3 feet had a wave that hit David (in the front of the canoe) high in the chest. We calculated that we had taken in about 20 gallons, which being the heavier guy on the trip, was all sitting down with me in the back of the boat. We pulled over to the side only to startle off a copperhead (poisonous snake) from the bank. Neither of us really like snakes, reason again why I prefer to backpack in the northern regions.

Canoe-dling

2006-07-23T20:44:00.000-04:00

It turned out to be the perfect weekend. Quick outcomes to my previous concerns...

(1) Sleeping Bag worked great.
(2) Reds had a 2:55 rain delay. Even though we only stayed for the first 6 innings, I didn't get home and to bed until 1:45. I delayed getting up until 5:30.
(3) Krispy Kremes -- not even a consideration

It was pouring when I got up in the morning. Like pouring so much that when I backed the car into the garage to load my gear that a rabbit almost came inside to get out of the rain. (I would have let him if he had asked politely, but would have considered trading him for the steaks for dinner). I got out at about 6:15 and made it across town to David's by 6:45. We loaded our gear and strapped on the canoe. We were running a little late and didn't leave town until about 8 -- making it right on time to the shuttle by 10 on the nose.

There is a little joke about the shuttle in that the bus ride to the drop off is the most "exciting" part of the trip. I believe that the bus and I share a birthday and I must say that I have aged more gracefully. To further the comparison, it is a short bus. So picture the old short bus pulling a trailer of canoes/kayaks stacked 2x2 and 3 high going a bit speedily down twisty mountain 1 1/2 lane roads. After my experiences in Asia, I sat peacifully and watched the scenery go by.

There were two other groups in the bus.

The first group was a man & wife with I believe a younger brother. They were engaged in diligently looking at the topo map to memorize landmarks, etc... I found this funny for 2 reasons: (1) It is a river without any forks or tributaries so there is only 1 way that you can go, and (2) I did the same exact thing my first trip. We saw this group on the water and they probably ended up fine.

The second group was what appeared to be 3 buddies with a girlfriend thrown in to round out the group to 4. I am sure that somewhere in a night of drinking one guy suggested the idea, the buddies said that they were "in", and the girlfriend asked to come so that the boys wouldn't get into trouble. We saw them three times on the river:

After the very first small rapid and each of them had almost flipped the canoe there were phrases heard from a distance like "I don't know what you want me to do" and "Fine, paddle on your own"
After we had landed for the night, set up camp and were well into cooking our steaks -- when they passed by us on the river looking remorsefully at us and stopped, looking exhausted almost as if they wanted to share our site.
The next morning as we passed them about a mile downstream where the two buddies were out canoeing circles (but improving their skills) so that the other two could argue back at camp.

Regardless, this trip was not about other people. In fact, we only saw people for a few minutes total out of the two days. The weather was perfect. The scenery was gorgeous. The camp site was soft sand. The bugs were almost non-existent. One of my best trips.

David also broke my curse of the fish. He caught 10 in the boat, but about 13-14 total. 3 of them were probably big enough to keep (small mouth bass). We saw deer munching by the river banks. We saw heron, ducks and all sorts of fish/turtles in the water. The water was clear enough to see the bottom to 6-8 feet.

The ONLY downer on the trip was that the water was a bit low so we had to drag the canoe a couple of times. David has a new canoe (a Dagger) that keeps a line in the water better, but is slightly less maneuverable. I was steering and there were a couple of rapids where I missed my line. I blame the boat (not the fact that this was my first time in 4 years.)

Anyway -- great trip that ended perfectly. I returned home, kissed the wife (quickly due somewhat to my odor and her gag reflex) and took a long hot shower.

Planned Spontaneity

2006-07-20T22:11:00.000-04:00

After the third planning discussion for our spontaneous trip, we have the food and gear down. We meet at 6:30 a.m. Saturday to travel south to Big South Fork to meet the outfitter at 10 that will transport us upstream to the launch point.

I am in the midst of packing and have recognized that I have a a couple of items/situations that may not fare as well as I would hope.

Outage #1
I bought an awesome sleeping bag for my trip to Glacier where the average nightly tempatures at altitude will hover between 25 F and 35 F. This sleeping bag has a comfort rating of 24.8 F which should be wonderful in the chilly northwest. Unfortunately, the low temperature for Saturday night is slightly above that at 59 F.

Outage #2
I have Reds tickets for Friday night. So I should get home around 12:30. Assuming I have to meet my friend at 6:30, that gives me a whopping 5 hours of sleep assuming the car is already packed and I go right to sleep when I get home. (See China blog for history of how well I do with less than 7 hours)

Outage #3
I am just not used to canoeing and therefore I am really struggling whether or not I should take extra oatmeal or stick with the dozen Krispy Kreme doughnuts.

... and in thinking so, I have to say that I can't think of doughnuts without thinking of my friend Doug who told me the last time that I saw him that "bread is the devil!" Well, Doug -- I may sin a little this weekend. Oddly, 6 is the number of the beast AND the number of doughnuts in my share of the package. Coincidence?

Canoe Tripping

2006-07-18T22:52:00.000-04:00

This weekend is a spur of the moment canoe trip. I should stop to define spur of moment for a planner as we planned out the date a few weeks ago during the World Cup Semi's and we have not a more than a confirmation discussion about it since that time. Sure, it is only an overnighter on a river that I have been on before. We should only need one more planning session for our spur of the moment trip and we will be good to go.

However, it should be noted that the last time we went we tried (less than legally) to run a Class 4 rapid (after portaging our gear) that ended as you would expect. I say "as you would expect" as in you have two guys that have been out in the sun all day with limited experience in white water. I say "as you would expect" assuming you had predicted that we would not make the first cut to the right and we were flipped, I hit my head on a rock, blacked out and was pushed through the chute and surfaced later under the canoe without my only pair of prescription glasses only to blurrily watch some sort of water snake swimming towards me.

The first question everyone asks at this point, after the expected "You guys are stupid" or "What were you thinking!" statments, is "Was the snake poisonous?" Let me summarize my story to draw you to my response. Head hurt - Glasses Lost -- Snake. I can only say that I was doing my best Jesus impersonation (running on water) and did not stop to check the shape of the head. My apologies.

So this time we are older and wiser. My friend (of 25 years) has two kids now and is rather more responsible. Since this time we have also lost a childhood friend in a kayak accident. So I imagine we will be a trifle more careful.

After backpacking though, canoeing is a beautiful thing. When you backpack, you are attempting to carry the minimum amount shelter, food, water, and clothing in order to survive. Canoeing is like backpacking with a bunch of Sherpas -- you get to go along, but something else is carrying all your stuff...

For example:
Backpack Breakfast -- Oatmeal, Instant coffee
Canoe Breakfast -- Eggs (fresh), bacon, biscuits and Cafe Americano's
Backpack Lunch -- Twisted, hot sticky power bar (two on the tough days)
Canoe Lunch -- Subway Footlongs
Backpack Dinner -- Reconstituted Dehydrated Sweet & Sour Pork
Canoe Dinner-- Charcoal grilled (yes we bring both) thick cut steaks, baked potatoes and smores. This year, as a bonus, I am taking a contraption that makes homemade ice cream as well.

Oh -- and with the canoe meal we eat sitting in lounge chairs.

Absence makes the blog grow fonder...

2006-07-18T22:46:00.000-04:00

I have been a bit more casual about my blogs since my grandfather passed away. It seems that when my father became the elder statesman of the family, I realized that I was not too far from being next in succession -- and I did a bit of introspective thought as one is wont to do. As a bit of an introvert by nature, extrovert only by force -- this did not lend itself to keeping up with the blogging. My bad.

Planning with Planners

2006-07-10T22:38:00.000-04:00

I have learned a few things about planning adventure travel with folks who are responsible for detailed planning & execution in their daily work lives.

1) All planning quota is met or exceeded at work
2) Email is a one way communication mechanism
3) If you want something done, bribery is the only workable alternative

I consider someone in on the trip if they buy airline tickets. We are therefore down to 2 travelers from 4. I consider this a bit ironic as I planned on some attrition and therefore had 6 tentative and 2 possible backups.

At least at this point, we aren't too far past the deposits. Sigh.

Unplanned Events

2006-06-24T11:45:00.000-04:00

Today, my grandfather passed away.

William Leander Montgomery, 89, died on June 23, 2006, at Wesley Village Retirement Center in Wilmore, Kentucky, where he moved in 2002. He is preceded in death by his wife of 68 years, Alberta Lee Brickey Montgomery.

Born on February 3, 1917, William was the son of Leonard and Carrie Montgomery. He was a 1935 graduate of Sciotoville High School, where he excelled in football, basketball, and tennis. He was the captain and quarterback of the 1934 Tartan football team, and was awarded the game ball after their 14-7 victory over Central Catholic. He also was known as “the scoring flash” of the 1935 Tartan basketball team, which won the Scioto County championship.

A veteran of World War II, he served in Military Intelligence Services in England and France, earning two battle stars and a good conduct medal. He remained in the Army Reserve after the war until age 60, reaching the rank of chief warrant officer.

William was employed by the Norfolk and Western Railway for 37 years, where he worked as a clerk and office manager. During his last ten years of employment, he held the position of Labor and Material Analyst for the Scioto Division. After retirement, he worked part-time as a bookkeeper for Tim Doyle Landscaping until 1999.

William had a desire to be used by God, and to share his faith with others. During his lifetime, he was an active member of several churches including Tabernacle Baptist Church of Chillicothe, Ohio; Christ’s Community Church of Portsmouth, Ohio; and Berean Baptist Church of Sciotoville, Ohio. His church activities included service as a deacon, trustee, youth leader, Sunday school teacher, and Sunday school superintendent. In 1955, he was named chairman of the building committee, overseeing the construction of a new sanctuary for Tabernacle Baptist Church and later a classroom addition in 1965. He was involved in the Gideon’s International Society for 50 years, serving several years as treasurer. He also was a member of the Kentucky Colonels, the Masons, and the Golden Bears of Shawnee State University.

An avid gardener, William maintained a vegetable garden up until his death.

William was preceded in death by brothers, Charles and Edmund, and a sister, Alene Booten, and survived by sisters, Lucille Deemer, and Gretchen Stanley. Also surviving him are a son and daughter-in-law, L. D. and Linda Montgomery of Nicholasville, KY; a daughter and son-in-law, Julia and Ellis Conley of Elkins, WV; and a son, John R. Montgomery of Columbus, OH, as well as five grandchildren, two great-grandchildren, and many nieces and nephews.

Visitation will be Monday evening 6-9 pm with funeral services on Tuesday at 10 am at Brant Funeral Home in Sciotoville, Ohio. Burial will follow at the family cemetery at Lost Creek, Kentucky, overlooking the farm where William was born.

In lieu of flowers, donations may be made to the Gideon’s International Society.

Gear Planning

2006-06-19T22:07:00.000-04:00

We are trying to figure out what we need to get -- buy, borrow, or steal for our trip. As the good little planner I have a spreadsheet to cover the food to manage price, weight and caloric content. I also have a spreadsheet to list all of the individual, group, and optional gear based on whether it must be purchased or if I can borrow it from the other part-time adventurers that feel good with the idea that if they can't get away to the wild that their gear can still go.

The goal is to minimize weight while maximizing comfort. For example, last year I went with the very lowest (or should I say flattest) of the low sleeping pad. From a weight perspective I was doing well (I think I saved about 11 oz). However, as I never really got into a deep sleep, I think that the energy I saved was easily sucked out of me. I still have a pine root imprint on my left shoulder blade.

The first time that I went out backpacking, I really had no idea what I was doing. To put it in perspective, the first time I went out -- I wouldn't sit on the ground because I didn't want to get dirty. I brought a complete change of clothes (cotton) for each day. My pack, for a two-night outing, weighed 68 pounds.

I now work to get my backpack closer to 30-35 pounds tops for a week outing. Some of it is going minimal with the gear. In the backpacking world, the weight is inversely proportional to the dollars. For instance, my birthday present this year (August 20 for those wanting to send gifts) was a $320 10 degree sleeping bag that only weighs 1 pound 4 ounces and packs smaller than a bread loaf. By comparison, by last bag -- 20 degrees, $100, 3 1/2 pounds and the size of a large microwave.

Individual Gear:
Midweight Hiking Boots - Sandals/Tivas - Sock Liners (3 Pair) - Hiking/Socks (3 Pair) - Pants (Convertible?) - Shorts - Underwear - Thermal (Midweight) Bottoms - Thermal (Midweight) Top - Non-Cotton Shirt (2) - Long Sleeve Shirt - Fleece Jacket - Rain Pants - Rain/Med Coat - Hat - Sleeping Hat - Light Gloves - Trekking Poles - Backpack - Sleeping Bag (20F or Lower) - Toiletries - Bags - Sleeping Pad - Knife - Headlamp/Flashlight - Whistle - Caribiner/Rope - Wristwatch - Nalgene Bottles (2) - Mug

Optional Items
Backpack Cover - Bladder/Platypus - Gaitors - Luxury Item - Sunglasses - Camera - Binoculars - Fishing Gear

Group Items
Two Man Tent (2) - Ground Cloth (2) - Stove - Gas Canisters (2) - Lighter (2) -
Water Filter (2) - First Aid Kit - Repair Kit - Map - Compass - Sunscreen - Toothpaste - Cooking Pot - Utensils - Emergency Blanket - Sanitizer - Dish Soap - Freezer Bags - Toilet Paper - Food - Energy Drinks - Tea

Q/A from the list (less than 24 hours later)
1. Shorts? Sleeping not so much as wandering around camp. The thermals really aren't all that water resistant -- and the only place to sit is the ground or a log, both of which are usually some kind of damp. Optional in ounce counting, recommended for comfort.

2. Hats? I burn easily, so I recommend a waterproof cowboy style hat to protect the neck and ears from burning. However, for the first 5-6years of hiking -- I just wore a baseball cap. My first trip to Yellowstone I had to tuck a bandana into a baseball cap because my neck and ears got so sunburned the blisters were peeling. This memorable lesson made me rate dorky hat over cool hat. (This, and the realization that everyone was looking at the scenery and not me. Besides the fact that the smell alone would drive anyone away from me.)http://www.rei.com/online/store/ProductDisplay?storeId=8000&catalogId=40000008000&amp;amp;amp;productId=69&parent_category_rn=5227674&vcat=REI_SSHP_MENS_CLOTHING_TOC For the night, 80% of your body heat goes out of your head, so sleeping in cold temps requires a good hat that will keep you warmer. This is like a toboggan or knit hat for winter. I have a lightweight black fleece hat that makes me feel like a rapper. Word.

3. Bags? You won't want to just throw your gear in your pack in a disorganized way-- so you will have a bag (compression) to smash your clothes in, a bag for your sleeping bag (if it didn't come with one) etc... I have a few extra.http://www.rei.com/online/store/Search?storeId=8000&query=*&cat=4500447&vcat=REI_SEARCH:C

4. Air mattress? You could I guess, but not recommended. Check weight and make sure that if it rips we can repair. Roll/Stuff into a gear bag will help. I have a great really lightweight flat one that you can borrow (see note above).

5. Knife? Any kind -- a multi-tool or swiss army is nice. But we won't need it for too much other than to clean all the fish we catch. (insert skeptical cough here)

6. LED Light? I like them. We aren't hiking at night, so enough to find the bathroom (read: nearby tree) or to enjoy a book in the tent is good. LED is good as it has limitedweight, long life.

7. Whistle? Scott (our expert friend and former wilderness guide) will make fun of this one -- but it is a safety thing if we get separated and lost. Actually -- everyone makes fun of this -- but please note that I didn't require bear bells, pepper spray or boat flares. Allow me my little piece of obsessive compulsive boy scout safety.

8. Shared rope? Nope, each of us have some. Given a thin rope (harder to pull significant weight) and larger group, individual food/clothing bags are easier to manage. I will have rope and caribiner for each, but may need to pick up some slight extra.

9. Nalgene Bottles? Nalgene Bottles are indestructible (mostly) and the water filter conveniently screws into the top. Not required, but you will need to carry about 64 oz ofwater in bottles separate from your bladder. I have a bunch and can loan -- but you see them everywhere in stores.http://www.rei.com/online/store/Search?topStyles=664604%2C729143%2C720282%2C703207%2C719867%2C712330&noalias=1&brand=Nalgene&stat=7889&topStylesTitle=best+sellers+for+nalgene&langId=-1&orig=nalgene&storeId=8000&vcat=REI_SEARCH

10. Bladder? Like a Camelback without the backpack.

11. Share the Binoculars? I don't take them because either they are heavy or aren't powerful enough to justify themselves, but if someone wants to carry them they are more than welcome. Sharing is usually encouraged.

12. GPS Unit? I have never taken one, but it should be interesting. I think that you can download the park and we can chart progress.

Glacier Hiking

2006-06-13T21:03:00.000-04:00

Last year, Day 4 -- Helen Lake aka "My Happy Place"

In less than twenty four hours the National Park Service responded that our trip was approved. They really are efficient and helpful there. In the last three years, I have never had a complaint. This is really is one of the best parks in the nation.

Our trip is from the southwest up over the Continental Divide to the southeast of the park. We don't really have enough time for a full extended backpack, so we are going to cover some decent mileage and elevation change over a shorter window. My preference is to spend a couple of days prior to the backcounty to get acclimated, check gear, etc... I then like to have a day to do the touristy things at the end of the trip to get all the stiffness out of the legs prior to flying home. Instead, we go out on day one and come out the afternoon prior to flying home. I am working on getting Nicole to come out with me a few days early, so I will be in good shape, but I do worry a little bit about the other guys. However, my fitness level will even out the pace to compensate for the altitude, I am sure.

http://www.nps.gov/glac/whatsnew/bcres/bcmap.htm

Day 1: Fly in most likely to Kalispell (or Great Falls) Night One will be in the Many Glacier Hotel (http://www.glacierparkinc.com/ManyGlacierHotel.htm) where they have the best breakfast buffet in Montana. I will take the guys to a couple of local holes-in-the-wall (Park City Cafe http://www.we8there.com/rest_detail.php?busid=1090 and Two Sister's Cafe) for a calorie overload with a joyous ending of good pie. I alreay know that I will get the strawberry rhubarb or banana cream or the razzleberry or the...

Day 2: Drive around to the southwest side of the park and check in with the Rangers and watch a fun little video on why you don't want to look appetizing to the folks ahead of you on the food chain (black bears, grizzly bears and mountain lions). This video is much better than the one at Yellowstone (my first big trip back in 1999) where they show someone being carried out in a body bag after Yogi got a little carried away. The first hike is an easy 7.2 miles to the Lower Park Creek campsite (PAR). We use this part of the trip to ensure that everybody's pack is comfortable and no one is having too much difficulty adjusting to the altitude. The view will not be too spectacular today, but we will be really isolated.

Day 3: We get up this morning and hike a leisurely 7.5 miles to the Upper Park Creek campsite (UPP). Our goal is to cover more distance than see the sites, but we have an excellent chance of seeing a good number of black bear.

Day 4: Today is the shorter day with a 2.3 mile steep 1,000 ft. climb to Lake Isabel (ISA) which is rated "Very Good" for catching Rainbow Trout. I will bring stuff to cook all the fish the guys will catch -- but in all honesty I have had to carry out every single fish-cooking-ingredient as no one I have ever hiked with has ever caught anything. We should have some free time today (Nicole stop reading) to climb/scramble up some cliffs beyond (Nicole start again) just fishing.

Day 5: The good news about Day 5 is that the higher you climb in altitude, the better the views become. Today is our longest, our highest, our most brutal. We backtrack the 2.3 miles and 1,000 ft. down from Isabel and head the 6.0 miles to Cobalt Lake (COB) which will include a 2,500 ft. climb over Two Medicine Pass and then down 1,000 ft. to the campsite. I am packing extra energy gel and Vitamin I for this fun day. (Vitamin I = Ibruprofen)

Day 6: We have about 6.5 miles and 2,500 ft. down to the boat docks to meet a ferry back to the nearest Ranger station. If we miss the boat, it changes to about 10 miles back to the station where we would park a car. We stay tonight in the East Glacier Lodge (http://www.glacierparkinc.com/GlacierParkLodge.htm) and pack our stinkiness in as airtight a manner as possible. It really is too bad that we don't have to pass through customs as all we would have to do to smuggle anything would be to leave our socks on top and they would wave us through from a distance.

Day 7: Fly home. I considered staying longer, but I have Reds tickets for the next day.

Next Trip - Glacier

2006-06-11T22:23:00.000-04:00

We are now planning for the next trip backpacking in Glacier at the end of August. I am taking 3 guys who have never been (I have spent almost 5 weeks over the last two years). There lies my only advantage as it turns out all them have a very bad habit of exercising on a more regular basis than annual backpacking trips. One of them hikes and the other two, based on fitness level, could probably carry me in their packs if need be.

I am trying to work out with Nicole's schedule where she can meet us out there either before or after the guy trip as they each can only go for a week and I have 3 non-committed weeks of vacation to burn.

My first choice of trip is out due to the timeframe (we can only go 4 nights backcountry) and reservations. The trip planning is fun in that the number of campsites is limited and they only reserve 1/2 of them prior to your arrival. Therefore you always have a full trip that you plan -- but then you completely change it when you get there. Last year we did that only to have to settle for a bit more mileage/elevation change than I like... It resulted in a bunch of "I told you so" moments, but was a great time. The conversation generally will run "Well I can get you to that campsite, but you have to hike 12 miles uphill that day and then..."

This year, for the reserved trip, I am aiming for the southeast corner of the park that we were not able to make last year. To keep it interesting we are going to hike across the entire park which will include a climb over the Continental Divide. The main campsite I was hoping to use is closed for Grizzly activity, which is a bit scary, but now we have a short hike day at a great fishing location (which was a request from two of the guys.)

More to come soon...

Only Time Will Tell...

2006-06-11T21:09:00.000-04:00

International Music
The title of this blog came from my international musical experience through the Northwest Airlines (NWA to those in the know) "radio station". Yes, I listened to music from all over the world groups like "Asia" who lent us the title and Europe (Final Countdown from the "Rock Classics" station). I must say there is only one way to make a 24 hour day of flight better -- and it is simply by having 80's synthezizer choruses stuck in your brain.

Final Days
The rest of the work week was relatively predictable. Breakfast became less and less adventurous where in the beginning if I couldn't tell what it was -- I would try to eat it. Later in the trip, I was eating simply scrambled eggs, toast and papaya (with tea) -- and staring hard at the Cocoa Pebbles too afraid of the milk to make a move. I have made a note that my next trip to Asia will include powdered milk. I am sure you have the image of me smuggling contraband cocoa pebbles in my pocket, sneaking back to the room to enjoy the blissful hints of chocolate left in the safe to drink American milk...

Wednesday night we were a smaller group, just Jesse, Andy and I back to Roma's Bar & Restaurant Bar (no typo, that is how the window reads) for good Italian food. As it was a very traditional Italian place, I was conflicted as to whether to get the Tacos again or the Fajitas (I went with the latter). Very good and I must say that they were the best Italian Tacos I have ever had.

After dinner, if it was legal to do so, I would tell you about the DVD dealer on the corner on the way that had movies out that were very current. The way as I understood the story, here is how it works...

The day the movie comes out --- available on DVD by "Kramer Cam". Not that I got MI-3, but if someone had, in the first five minutes you actually see a guy get up, walk out of screen and come back with popcorn
One week after movie is out --- someone has plugged into the sound board for better sound and has taken the time to setup the start of the DVD to allow for scene selections, etc..
Two weeks after the movie is out -- someone has made a true copy for a complete DVD of the movie (no extra special features)

Nicole had threatened that if I did get any less than legal DVDs that her and her library-copyright-protection-posse would come down on me in a bad way. This does have me long for days when the worst thing you had to deal with from a librarian was a shush and a harsh look. Apparently now the MLS program includes some martial arts and counter-terrorism tactics.

By Thursday (note 2 business days left), the China team had warmed up enough to me to ask very detailed questions. So Thursday flew by. It was my pick for dinner Thursday night and we went to a Brazilian place (why not?) I had been to one in the US, and it was a similar deal -- gouchos (guys) come around with random meat on a stick that you can select for them to slice on your plate. In the US, it is beef, turkey, pork and usually the delicacy of chicken hearts (very good with lime). In China, it was beef, chicken, pork and camel. For the curious reader, while camels may store water in their humps, the moisture does not carry over to the meat. It was worth the taste but is not as flavorful as the soup from the foot of the hen.

Speaking of... My favorite Mandarin story was one day at lunch Andy was trying to call the waitress over (in Mandarin) only to have everyone look at him funny. Finally, one of the women at the table asked him "Why do you keep saying Chicken Feet?" This became my curse word of choice for the rest of the trip.

Friday we packed up to leave. After taking a bath in all of the bottled water I had hoarded over our two week stint, I packed everything up choosing to take pearls over tennis shoes. I almost choked on my $10,000 hotel bill -- until I realized it was for two weeks and you divide by 8 for USD. Our main trainee arranged for a special Korean meal for Jesse across town -- and it was really good. They brought out a very hot cast iron pot for each of us where the food was simmering in the bowl like a fajita. A fresh egg was simmering on top of it -- and you stirred it all up.

We only found out after this lunch was scheduled that there was another restaurant a couple of blocks from the office where if you ordered chicken they brought out the live chicken to prove it's health and freshness -- and then took it back to get it ready (and then brought the whole chicken back out). Also, there were several other animals that you could choose from, Red Lobster style, and have similarly prepared. Sorry I missed it.

Friday had us taking a border car back to Hong Kong. Crossing a border seems to be a great equalizer as all types of cars were queued up for a good distance. We got behind a very nice Ferrari. We checked into our hotel at the airport and took the train back into Hong Kong (1/2 hour) to go to Stanley Market (1/2 hour bus ride). Stanley, for future reference closes at 7 p.m. Luckily the restaurants do not. We ate at Beaches again and had pizza.

Saturday Kathy flew home and Andy, Jesse and I met relatively early (10) to take the Hydroplane ferry to Macao. Here, in a crowning moment for OCD folks everywhere -- since I always had my passport with me, I was the only one who could go... (One forgot, One didn't know). So Andy went to his hotel to get (1 hour round trip) and we were to meet Jesse at the Macao lighthouse at 3 (Jesse had a 2 1/2 hour round trip to our hotel).

Macao, it should be noted, is known for the gambling, prostituion, opium, and very nice Portuguese architecture. While we had very limited time for the first three, we did manage to get a bunch of great pictures of the architecture. It was raining (wow, rain in monsoon season, go figure). We got a tourist map at the ferry station and got around the island by pointing at the picture since my Portuguese and Cantonese is equally as strong. We started with a Buddhist temple that was pretty and it was interesting to see folks toss paper money into the fountains instead of coins. We then thought we could walk to the next point of interest on foot (based on my top ten travel guide map) and got to see several other sides of Macao not generally covered in tourist information. Once we found a street that saw some vestige of sunlight, we were able to head to the Sky Needle for a rapid lunch. We caught a taxi to the lighthouse to meet our friend, who arrived breathless at 3:45. Apparently my idea that the lighthouse must be -- (1) close to the shore which logically would be near the ferry and (2) be easy to find/get to -- was a bit off. We then toured some ruins and went to a casino to let provide one of us a chance to donate money to the locals and two of us to sit at the bar (me included). I did sneak off for a Portuguese bakery to get a local custard thing which was excellent.

Saturday night was back to Hong Kong for Italian at the wonderful backstreet restaurant that we never would have found on our own. We made it back to the hotel around midnight and I need to finish packing to leave the room by 5:30 the next morning. All part of the plan so that I could sleep on the plane.

Rounding Third and Heading for home...
The plane ride home was uneventful. I only slept one hour which made the same movies from the flight over all that more exciting. King Kong does lose something on a 5x9 screen. We arrived joltingly back through US Customs and on home no worse for the wear. Nicole, as promised, took me directly to Ted's for some well deserved "home" cooking.

Creepy
The story of the trip would not be complete without a complete rendition of this piece of "art" that I had done while I was there. I had a B&W picture of Nicole that a friend (I won't say "ex") took of her at my little sister's bridal shower. I carried this picture 1/2 way around the world where I saw a local artist doing charcoal drawings of caricatures or portraits from a picture. Through my primitive communication (pointing and grunting) we reached an agreement of 200RMB to have this done. He gave me a receipt in Chinese and told me to meet him here in 2 days. I said 3 days as I was going to be out that night. I then picked it up -- and the picture was admired by all on the square (oddly, the policeman kept following me to look at it). I then took the unframed, uncovered art back to the hotel under cover of my small umbrella (I got wet) for safety. This art was carefully hand-held to work on Friday, placed in a special area so it would not rub the charcoal. It was hand-held through border crossings, three airline exchanges and customs and hung in a locker by itself on the international flights. It also required special tower and federal approval to be hung in the pilot's area on the small flight from Detroit to Lexington as I refused to place it in the overhead compartment. All this story, this quest, this challenge I tell you -- all this to be told by Nicole that the picture is "Creepy".

It is good to be home.

Tastes of Home

2006-05-24T09:52:00.000-04:00

Updated 10 Day Weather Forecast from Weather.com for Shenzhen
Wednesday - Scattered Thunderstorms, mid 80's
Thursday - Scattered Thunderstorms, mid 80's
Friday - Scattered Thunderstorms, mid 80's
Saturday - Scattered Thunderstorms, mid 80's
Sunday - Scattered Thunderstorms, mid 80's
Monday - Scattered Thunderstorms, mid 80's
Tuesday - Scattered Thunderstorms, mid 80's
Wednesday - Scattered Thunderstorms, mid 80's
Thursday - Scattered Thunderstorms, mid 80's
Friday - Scattered Thunderstorms, mid 80's

Tuesday was another good day. Breakfast was good and the entertainment was provided by one of the hotel staff members whose job it was to wipe the humidity from the floor to ceiling windows that span the 50 meter wide dining room. Given the climate, the subtropical humidity would easily catch up within 5 or so squeegees. (I think that is the first time I have ever had to write that word.)

(Non-work people please skip to the next paragraph)
More training on Tuesday for the reporting system. We documented out a better data model and reviewed existing reports for reusable code. We then were able to connect to the development environment and create some basic reports. Very positive signs. The afternoon was spent working through a presentation on the justification of functional support and oversight personnel to ensure the proper adoption and quality of the tools.

(Resume)
We had lunch brought in. The concept of "Take out Chinese" is rather redundant. My Dad asked me to see if I could find "General Tso's Chicken" here to see if it was real. This line of interogation was fun. We started by establishing that it was chicken. We could not get the concept of "General Tso" across -- so we dropped that. We then went on to describing the dish -- which, for the uninitiated, you should describe this as chicken with or without bones. This was as far as we got as it became readily apparent that describing the detailed ingredients in the sauce (16 ingredients are used from First Wok in NKY) that this wasn't going to help either as the folks in the office generally do not cook. Sorry Dad -- I don't think it is real.

Oh - take out food is good here. Rice and stuff. All them come with soup, which mine had suggestions of chicken stock and some slightly bitter green. Bad description - good soup. Alas, no fortune cookie (before anyone emails me, yes I knew that fortune cookies are an American thing).

We left late after the training to go back to the hotel. We then made it over to Gypsy's in Sea World (name of the area, no Shamu) which is owned by an Australian couple. We had really good appetizers that significantly cut into our stomach quota for dinner. Beef Fajita Nachos where the chips were Doritos (why hasn't anyone thought of this before!!!!) and fried calimari. I got gnocchi for dinner (excellent) where the other folks got either salmon or ocean perch. I almost climbed over the table to steal some mashed potatoes as I definitely had been craving them. But alas, I will have to wait for home. (Nicole has promised that we are going straight to Ted's from the airport.) We rushed back to the hotel after dinner for a 9-11 call -- that didn't happen after an hour of waiting. Sigh.

Oh, by the way -- it rained today.

A few other random observations:
1) The grocery store here is an experience. On Sunday, we went to the local store in Shekou (Park & Stop) to see what the locals have to choose from. As a "shout out" to my former P&G comrades, I reviewed the choices of Pringles (Regular, Sour Cream & Onion, BBQ, Tomato... Before choosing what I am sure to be a hit in the states, the "Grilled Shrimp & Pepper" Pringles. Tastes just like described. Email me quickly if you want me to bring some home.
2) Other items were of equal interest. Sunkist does not come in just boring old orange, but also in grapefruit, california essence (good) and carrot. I was a little nervous about carbonated carrot, but this is more like Sunny Delight
3) All dairy products are expensive but ice Cream is really expensive -- like $30 US for a quart. Nicole would not survive -- or we would be homeless -- or by writing that I just made a huge mistake and I am now homeless. Eek.
4) You cannot order a diet soft drink here. It is "Coke Light". If you ask, they will say that they do not have diet coke (and do not know what it is). If you say "Coke Light" you will be brought a can reading Diet Coke.
5) No one from OSHA should ever come here without their heart medication. As a respected colleague reminded me to describe, all scaffolding here is made from bamboo poles that are lashed together either with wire ties (like twisties) or electrical tape. You will see dozens of workers at every level for several stories on this scaffolding -- and it is everywhere.
6) We, in America, are not making the best use of travel by scooter or bicycle. Here they have learned from the ants that a man on a bicycle can carry eight times his own body weight (and mass). I have seen loads that would make a pickup truck shudder navigating against traffic on the 8 lane interstate peddled by an eighty year old man. I have also seen, on multiple occasions, women riding side saddle on the back of a bicycle eating their lunch with chopsticks. Color me impressed.
7) As an American man, I must be rare enough here to look famous. On Sunday, at the cultural park, a giggling teenage girl ran up and asked our tour guide if she could get her picture taken with us. Even though I have been so relieved to not have to sign all those autographs like back in the States, I obliged. I am Matt Damon's stunt double afterall.
8) Everyone here is courteous and considerate. Nothing funny to say here -- I am just amazed and appreciative of the genuineness of the Chinese people. It is good for the soul.

7.5 hours sleep -- a new record. I am a new man.

Oh, yeah -- the job

2006-05-23T02:04:00.000-04:00

Monday was relatively normal. Got up, instant messaged (would that be a new verb?) with Nicole, ate some papaya and drank some tea. In the morning, they offer you either coffee or tea. Try watching someone ask for decaf, it is a lengthy process that involves several members of the management team. Also, like the pervasive chicken, nothing is wasted with coffee -- fresh or not, the coffee from each pot will be served and consumed until gone. Caffeinated coffee is good, but when it has been at the hotel as long as I have -- well, let's just say that while I like a little pick-me-up in the morning, a slap in the face does not jump start my day.

Also, in preparing for the day in China, I have to find a new place to put my remote control. You see, the cleaning person seems to think that the remote must be in the case which is then placed (off center by 2 inches to the left) on top of the television. This game occurs every time they enter the room (once for cleaning, once for laundy on that day, once for turn down). By day three I decided that this was annoying. I mean really, to have to get up from the chair to go get the remote really goes against the definition of "remote". I have not stooped to locking it in the safe, but have been pretty clever so far. Doesn't matter. She finds it. I still have a chocolate next to my pillow every night so I have to think she thinks that this is fun, too. Just a little bit of excitement in the day.

I have also learned that after a week of being completely surrounded by unrecognizable discussion (signs, television, radio, conversations) that you really do tune things out. Yet at random times you will pick up a recognizable connection back to the old world. The "Musack" for breakfast today actually played the Shaker song "Tis a Gift to be Simple" on a piano at quarter speed. Odd.

Oh yeah, the job.... The morning started with training on the reporting system. This guy is pretty brilliant. He had skimmed through the book I brought him ($30 US = $240 RMB which impressed him as a gift). He then immediately caught on to what was going on. For the afternoon, I trained the group on one of the systems -- some really seemed to get it, some will require some 1x1 time -- and I don't mean this as just the cute ones.

Lunch was at a new place which served sunflower seeds like we serve peanuts at a TexMex restaurant. We had more good food -- less of the craziness. I am really starting to like the spicy green beans. Maybe it is because I like to live dangerously with the red/green excitement.

Dinner was a return to the Japanese place where the waitress want to make sure we were bringing Andy back. Andy and I ate 4 orders of salmon sashimi (each) with tuna sashimi, kobe beef filet, lamb, kimchee, needle mushrooms wrapped in bacon, scallops (in the shell) and too many other things to count. This was over two hours... and the waddle back to the hotel was nice.

Oh. It rained today.

6 hours of sleep.

Goodbye Typhoon, Hello Monsoon

2006-05-23T01:31:00.000-04:00

10 Day Weather Forecast from Weather.com for Shenzhen
Sunday - Scattered Thunderstorms, mid 80's
Monday - Scattered Thunderstorms, mid 80's
Tuesday - Scattered Thunderstorms, mid 80's
Wednesday - Scattered Thunderstorms, mid 80's
Thursday - Scattered Thunderstorms, mid 80's
Friday - Scattered Thunderstorms, mid 80's
Saturday - Scattered Thunderstorms, mid 80's
Sunday - Scattered Thunderstorms, mid 80's
Monday - Scattered Thunderstorms, mid 80's
Tuesday - Scattered Thunderstorms, mid 80's

Sunday Kathy, Andy, and I got up early (especially now that I have figured out how to sleep here) and went to the Chinese Cultural park which is about 20 minutes from our hotel. The park has areas (like Epcot) that represent all of the varied cultures of China from Tibet to the Pacific Ocean. The people in the office were nervous about us making it there (I can't imagine why -- I am a world traveler now with sunscreen, passport and "Top Ten" travel book) -- so someone came out and took a taxi with us to the park.

We thought it looked like it might rain, so we were armed with umbrellas. The English guide we had arranged met us at the entrance. For those of you that have been tour guides (as was one of my many jobs in college), it is tough to tell the same stories over and over -- and still tell them with the requisite energy that will make the jokes funny. I, luckily, did not have to deliver a punchline in another language. Here is where the phrase "Lost in Translation" has its roots. Tough crowd. Tough job.

He did have a lot of good information as we walked through -- and I only took 160 pictures (literally). I was most impressed with the papercutting (gift shop) where the girl (I just can't judge age here, she could have been fifty) was using scissors to cut a single piece of paper into entire montages of people, places, and things. Remember making snowflakes in Art Class? Yeah, it was kinda like that -- except this art would be significantly higher than "refridgerator grade". I was also really impressed with the level of detail in the recreations. The great wall was a few hundred meters long -- but was crafted individual brick by brick with bonsai trees and hand painted individual people there for the correct scale. It looks incredibly realistic, so it was fun to have my picture taken next to the wall like I was a character in Gulliver's Travels.

We broke for lunch because the rain had moved from a cats/dogs level to small farm animals. We went back to the hotel and ate at an Italian place where I had the best beef tacos of my life. Yes, I said that right -- Italian and Tacos. This is "Western" food.

The afternoon we had to ourselves until we were to meet for dinner at the Korean place for Jesse. I just got caught up on email and relaxed.

The Korean food was good for me (I didn't know any better). Jesse said it was the first Korean restaurant where they didn't understand Korean. My favorite was the Kimchee (fermented spicy cabbage) pizza. We had random meat grilled at our table and there were a lot of little bowls of stuff to eat. It was a slow night for the restaurant, so four waitresses stood within three feet of our table the whole meal to attend to us. I am not a paranoid person beyond the normal feeling that everyone is out to get me -- but sheesh, back off ladies.

I picked up a picture that I had commissioned to be drawn by a local guy -- and dog paddled back to the hotel. It was a good day.

6 hours of sleep

I know a guy...

2006-05-21T05:58:00.000-04:00

Saturday was a trip over to Hong Kong. We met for breakfast at 7 so that we would have time to catch the 7:45 ferry. I was happily armed with my sunscreen, passport, and "top ten" travel book. Nothing could go wrong.

Mishap #1
So when you buy a ticket to Hong Kong, it is important to specify which port is the intended destination. Apparently saying "Hong Kong" in Kentucky English sounds a lot like Macau which is a Porteguese controlled island known for the casinos. As well, if you recognize this mistake immediately before the boat leaves, the only thing that can make the situation more interesting is to be unable to speak the language and have your friends already on the boat. Long story short, somehow my moment of loud-obnoxious-American worked -- headed to Kowloon.

Mishap #2
The ferry travels over 30mph (literally) which is not fast for a car but on water with some ocean waves, you can feel it. The ferry was setup like an airplane with nice seats and tray tables -- and we didn't realize until we got there that we had assigned seats. Getting off the boat, since we were near cargo ships, the swells were 3-4 feet. We were to meet friends of Jesse -- but there was some confusion as to location so we were delayed a 1/2 hour or so.

Mishap #3
We left the ferry and went to the subway -- now a group of 5. When you get on the subway, the subway will beep 9 times in rapid succession and then the doors will shut -- and I mean shut in such a way that it will bruise, break, or cut off appendages. Not kidding. 4 of us jumped on, Kathy didn't make it. While the train was zooming off, we signaled that we would come back. After calling her on the PA, traveling back, and waiting for a while -- we decided that she had gone on to meet us at our next location -- The Peak.

Mishap #4-11
Luckily for Kathy, she had our tour book with the map. To summarize, we finally got the right subway, bus and tram connection to make it there. The tram goes up at about 45 degrees and then you ride back down backwards. We were worried about finding Kathy, so we took turns with the views overlooking Hong Kong. Pretty amazing sites. At this point, I was not very successful at softly suggesting lunch.

The Guy
We get a hold of Andy Ward and Kathy had as well -- so we met at Stanley Market. The bus ride there is comparable to the rocky cliff drive of route 1 in California if you were in a double decker bus without brakes (as we seemingly were). Spectacular. Andy, it should be noted, could be left anywhere in the world and would eventually find his way around and pretty much know where all the good spots are located.

Stanley Market is where you get the good stuff and it is generally real. The booth were I got the pearls has pictures of folks that have bought there -- including Bill Clinton. I got some good black and pink pearl necklaces. Women of the family, fear no longer as I only have the obstacle of returning safely home with them. (...and yes I recognize that I am now jinxed). We had lunch at a good restaurant called "Beaches" where I split two meals with Kathy -- a veggie pizza which was a cheese pizza with cold iceberg lettuce on top (still good) and I ordred the black (squid's ink) fettucine with a tomato cream sauce/seafood. Both very good... This market was somewhat more sane, like a claustrophobic flea market with aggressive Chinese saleswomen.

I know a guy...
We then left for the Ladies market for watches. Jesse wanted to see if his watch could get fixed. The rest of the story is all hypothetical, made up completely for your reading pleasure. I am sure that it could have happened to someone, somewhere -- but never to me. Never in writing.

First, let me explain the concept of "a guy". I know a guy that is a pretty good at landscaping. I know a guy that can always lend you some tools. I know a guy that can fix your computer. This, by our new definition, is not "a guy".

If, hypothetically, I knew a guy, he could only be reached by cell phone and would send a "go between" to meet and verify you. This "go between", for security purposes would lead you through a maze of stalls and dark alleys to a locked apartment building were you would go through a couple of gated entries to an elevator -- which you would take to a floor above the real floor, then walk down the steps, knock a secret knock and go throught to a heavily gated apartment. This apartment would contain wall to wall knock off purses and watches. If they didn't have it, a call would be made and a courier would arrive with the merchandise. This would be if and only if I knew "a guy".

We had dinner at TGIFridays and I had a club sandwich. Strange. I then slept on the ferry ride back, breezed back through customs and I slept 7 hours through the night...

Friday - Call it a "do over"

2006-05-21T05:16:00.000-04:00

On Friday, the decision to have my soda with ice was reviewed by the internal committee and found to be unacceptable. It was further determined that all other consumption decisions must therefore be removed from the premises until further notice. This decison was appealed to Mr. Pepto, but denied. Not even a local advocate, an un-named (in English) Chinese remedy (although quite tasty) could fully sway the committee's decision. Therefore I was banished to my room early in the afternoon for the remainder of the day.

Lunch prior to my internment was interesting as well. First I must paint a picture.

Imagine a very sunny day in Shenzhen. Imagine a group of tiny (American standard) Chinese women delicately dressed in pastel business suits walking in heels to lunch. (Same place as the first day -- relatively formal). Now picture these same women with parts of pickled? crunchy chicken feet hanging out of their mouths. Let me just say that I accept other cultures, but I have seen this movie and it usually ends with one of us suggesting that we split up to investigate the scary noise outside.

We had several good things for lunch or that at least looked really good. The most interesting (and determined to taste the best by the Lexington panel) was whole shrimp cooked in spices that made them orange. You were supposed to eat the head, shell, tail -- all of it. The folks from work were very concerned about me-- and ordered me a couple of soups to eat. The first was a fish soup kinda like fish & dumpling soup. As horrible as a description as that way -- it rocked. I also was given the chicken foot soup -- and given Woo Lon Tea (imagine herbal tea served Southern Style with twice the sugar) to help with digestion.

I hated everyone worrying about me. I felt incrediby guilty. The cab ride back was surreal as well as I sat up front, but the driver didn't speak any English. I just could say thank you at the end.

Dinner was small and reserved. Apple pie a la mode makes everything all better. 4 hours of sleep

That evening, the others went to a mall in Shenzhen where it is famous for knock-offs and trinkets. One guy bought a Rolex of which we believe the minute hand did not make it all the way around more than once.

Deep Thoughts

2006-05-18T23:18:00.000-04:00

Thursday was good. I would definitely recommend it. Friday is off to a good start. Feel free to try it out.

Thursday lunch was back to the Northern Chinese Restaurant. There are a number of places to eat near the office, but the team here goes to this restaurant everyday because (1) it is reasonably fast and (2) they can bring with them a typed up sheet with the menu in English with the Chinese characters on the side so that it is easy to order. (No one speaks English in these restaurants). We had a good soup again -- which turned out to be chicken foot soup. Lesson Learned: The first half of users served get good broth, the second half get good broth with interesting floaty things. Your choice. Food was excellent again.

It was an incredibly clear day and my training was finished, so Andy Ward and I left early to go hike to an observatory near the hotel that overlooks Shenzhen with views of the harbors and Hong Kong New Territories. The hike is paved and stepped the whole way. What started as a gradual path quickly became an exclamation point to my fitness level. I made it to the top of the first mountain (approximately 1500 ft elevation gain in about 3/4 mile) -- where Andy went on to go down and then up the second mountain to the higher point. We were 2 of 3 Americans on the trail out of approximately 400 or so people. This trail seemed to be a fitness event as well as leisure activity. The fitness folks were all travelling quickly in their NBA gear. The other folks
were walking in running shoes, high heels or barefoot. The latter two were not boosts for my self-esteem.

After the hike, I had to run through the red light district to make it back to the hotel in time to shower/get ready for dinner. Oddly, I had no problems with being propositioned in my sweaty state. Interesting.

We ate a Tapas restaurant where the name was the most Spanish thing about the place. Eight of us met for dinner, and two of us split 6 very small dishes: Smoked Salmon (on cooked potato), Seared Tuna Sashimi in Black Pepper, African Chicken, Bruscetta, Fried Goose Liver Pate with Cranberries (ech! my choice), and fried pork. For dinner, as the cheesecake fan, I had to try the Citrus Cheesecake which was unfortunately labeled as something special for "Sweet & Sour" fans. I think this was the first thing I have had here that I make better... ;-) I also forgot to ask for "no ice" in my soda (Coke Light = Diet Coke) and my stomach is delightfully reminding me of my omission.

Breakfast was uneventful barring the noticeable absence of fresh papaya. On a downward trend though -- 4 hours of sleep.

A few other lessons learned or items of daily life here to help you picture how things work and let you in on a few of my other obsessive compulsive behaviors.

1) The floors here are numbered starting with "G" for ground and then the 2nd floor is 1 and so on. In the office, the 2/3 elevators on the left and 1/3 on the right go to even numbered floors. The other only go to odd. The label reads (11-27) and somehow you are supposed to assume this means odd only. In the hotel, all elevators go to all floors, but there is not a 4th floor. It goes G - 1 - 2 - 3 - 5 - 6. I have checked and there really is not a fourth floor. Also, and I like this, the numbering below G is -1, -2, -3, etc...
2) We are allocated two 330ML bottles of water a day from the hotel to drink/brush teeth. Additional bottles of water cost 39RMB = $5 US. I need approximately 1 2/3 bottles of water and they will leave the unfinished bottle when the replinish it each day. Therefore every third day I have an unopened bottle that I don't want to lose. I don't know what I plan on doing with my hoarded aqua -- but rather than risk losing my allotment I am keeping the remainder in my safe.
3) I have a safe where I keep ridiculous things. I have my DVDs in there even though 3 blocks away I can buy pirated copies of any DVD imaginable for 5 RMB = $0.65 US. I keep my unusable phone and laptop in there as well. I also have a spare credit card for that just in case moment.
4) Laundry is expensive, but they are really really good at it. That is probably all I should say without making the stereotypical Chinese Laundry jokes. I receive my underwear and socks neatly packaged in plastic like I just bought it.
5) The light switches are set up to conserve power. I must have my key placed into a holder for the lights to come on -- as I left them (which is cool). If I take the key out, the lights switch off in 5 seconds and will not come on without the key. The neat thing is that I always know where my key is sitting when I leave the room.
6) For the hotel "Turn down" service, I thought that it was just a piece of chocolate next to the pillow, and they shut the blinds. However, one day they found that I had a closed travel alarm clock sitting out and they set it up for me. Not sure what that is about. They also seem to rearrange the furniture back to the original state which plays nice little head games with me.
7) I may not be the only American here, but I am 1 of 2 people now in all of China with facial hair. I can only imagine being the trend-setter that I am that everyone will be doing it next year.
8) Americans do look different to the locals. The Chinese woman at dinner thought I looked just like Matt Damon which made me feel really good about myself until I found out the other Americans at the table were Tom Cruise, George Clooney and Brad Pitt. No offense to Matt, but this was a statement as to "Something in this picture doesn't belong..."

I think that should be all for now... We are leaving the office an hour or so early today to travel around Shenzhen with some of the folks here.

Rules of Travel

2006-05-18T00:03:00.000-04:00

Travel here is interesting. I try to ignore the actual trip itself by viewing the scenery around me. I am really impressed with how beautiful the highways have been landscaped. They are incredibly maintained with palm trees, shrubbery and other tropical plants. Every couple of miles someone is out clipping the hedges, planting new flowers, or weeding the grass by hand.

On the road however, here are the rules, no um guidelines, well -- let's call them "understandings" for driving in China.

1) Everyone is generally considerate, there is not really a concept of "road rage". Folks honk to let you know that they are there, not to flip you off.
2) There are no stop signs. At four way stops you go when you either
a) Feel like you can squeeze in
b) Feel like you have waited long enough
3) One way streets are an intention, not a rule. Drivers will go against traffic if they think that they can save time.
4) Incredible depth perception is a requirement. If you can slip a piece of paper between your car and the next at full speed on the highway, that is more than enough room to change lanes.
5) Lanes are "guidelines". If taking up two lanes helps you manuever around, so much the better.
6) Don't slow down for pedestrians. They should know better than to be in the road

With all of this, I have only seen one accident and our commute is 45 minutes to 1 hour one way.

Meals
We had lunch at the restaurant below the Northern Chinese Food restaurant. No one got my joke that it must be "southern" Chinese food. I will assume it just got lost in translation. We had another round of a bunch of stuff. I say stuff because I asked what the meat was in another dish and they 1) laughed, 2) said "Don't ask", 3) talked at length in Chinese, and then 4) said "Pork". Somehow I doubt it. We had to wash our utensils again and the Chinese with us made fun of it... I really doubt though that tepid tea would actually sterilize anything. I bought lunch for 9 people -- 176 RMB (or $22 or $2.50 per person) for 11 different dishes. The benefits in eating in a non expat area.

Dinner was Japanese. We sat at a Hibachi table -- and then they recommended the buffet (advertised at 148 RMB per person). We could order from the menu anything we wanted. We ordered: salmon sashimi (several times), tuna sashimi, grilled salmon, grilled eel, pork, dumplings, sabo (buckwheat noodles), lamb chops, kobe beef burgers, grilled pumpkin, grilled japanese potato, california rolls (bad -- they put mayo in it), green tea ice cream and fried bananas. We hit if off with the waitress and our price was reduced to 118 RMB ($15 US) per person on the promise that we would bring back our friends.

Sleep -- 5 hours and change

Hong Kong Ty-Phooney

2006-05-16T21:57:00.000-04:00

Well, it does look like the typhoon "Chanchu" is going to miss us directly. The name "Chanchu" means "Pearl" ironically as this is what I was supposed to get in HK -- I don't think this is what anyone really meant.

From CNN...
"The storm was the strongest typhoon ever to be reported in the South China Sea in May, the observatory said. It roared toward Hong Kong after striking the Philippines last weekend, killing at least 37 people and leaving thousands homeless."
http://www.cnn.com/2006/WORLD/asiapcf/05/16/china.typhoon.ap/index.html

From Yahoo...
"In Shenzhen, local authorities issued landslide warnings at some high-risk places and were ready to evacuate people if necessary. Advertisement billboards in the city were either reinforced or removed."
http://news.yahoo.com/s/afp/20060517/sc_afp/asiaweather_060517054256

Well -- at least I don't feel like a wimp for being nervous.

The time delay here is interesting. I am writing this on Wednesday morning -- and my day will be finished long before anyone in the US gets started. I almost feel like telling everyone... "Hey, I have already done Wednesday and it was nothing special. Maybe you should skip it and hang on for Thursday, but why don't you wait and I will let you know how it goes."

Everything else is going well.

For lunch we ate northern Chinese Food. I know this because the name of the restaurant was "Northern Chinese Food". We had to wash our plates and utensils prior to touching (with the hot tea) which I felt guilty about (like an American elitist) but every ex-Pat seems to do it. The best dish was the spicy green beans which are served with hot red peppers. The message was "Eat the Green, not the Red". As a color-blind guy, that was fun. Andy Ward (Lexington guy here) would just keep peering in my bowl and say "Got a red". He is a very good guy... I have to think that some of my other friends would have let me go just to see the reaction.

We went to an Irish pub for dinner last night and I got my favorite (Bangers & Mash). Everything was just like in the US -- even the loud obnoxious Rugby team at the bar. Only the wait staff gave away that I was in China. Strange.

Also, I got a whopping 7 hours of sleep last night which rocks. Breakfast is still great -- and I have now eaten more papaya than I have in my entire life.

Today's Word Is...

2006-05-15T22:40:00.000-04:00

Today's word is "Boo Yaow". Can you say that? I have no idea how to spell it boys and girls -- but it is essential here to understand. It doesn't mean "Hello" or "Thank You" -- it means "Not Needed" and is incredibly useful for street peddlers, beggars and women of the night.

I was taught this by a Lexington guy that had been here a little while. I didn't completely trust him so I confirmed with a couple of other folks here. I was just nervous that he was going to have me say to the prostitutes "I'll take two".

I am still figuring out the time difference as I only have slept 3-4 hours a night so far. For those of you getting email from me, let me apologize now that I am grumpy. Let me also say that I have great sympathy for new mothers/fathers. Lack of sleep is not good for anybody. I think that is how wars have started.

Training restarted today after a long traffic-inspired commute. My guy asked really good questions today. I am feeling more confident that he is getting things... I completed my part and so I have the rest of the day to do application reviews for a production launch later this week.

Starbucks are everywhere

2006-05-15T08:42:00.000-04:00

The afternoon was pretty uneventful. Johnson (my primary trainee) was able to complete all of the tasks for the first system I taught him -- so I was feeling pretty good except for the barely being able to stay awake part.

We had Thai for dinner after walking past a McDonalds, KFC and Papa Johns. The Papa Johns offered delivery and there were a number of bicycles parked out front... I had a pineapple curry stir fry with prawns served inside the pineapple. Dinner for four was 336 RMB = $42 US. 10.50 per person isn't bad at all. I did splurge after dinner and go with Kathy to Starbucks. I looked over all of the pastries from Mango Cream Cake to Barbequed Pork Pie -- but settled for a Green Tea Frappucino (33 RMB or $4 US). With all of the green tea I am drinking, I should be an interesting color when I return.

One point of interest is that your choice here is either green or red tea (red is our black). So being red/green color blind this is an area that I definitely prefer our representation.

A point of closure -- turns out a laptop plug works everywhere and I simply needed to plug it into the wall. Thanks to all that remained silent and let me figure that one out.

First day on the job

2006-05-15T04:01:00.000-04:00

So today was the first day at work and the result of the first night's sleep. I am a completely different person after 4 hours of solid sleep. The mattress is Asian(?) which translates loosely to thin and hard. Other folks stuggled a bit with it. I took it as I was camping. Easy enough.

Breakfast in the hotel was a massive buffet. The other Americans ate American food. I tried all the new stuff -- stir fried noodles, local vegatables (zucchini?), fruit and dumplings of an unknown origin. It was all good.

We met Johnson Shi today and I ran through the tools and did some training. They took us to a very elegant lunch for dim sum and other Chinese food that was several plates and bowls that were shared by all (set up on a big glass lazy susan).

Spicy Pig's Ear (literally)
Some sort of sea plant
Chicken (different from US, very thick layer of fat/skin like a duck -- bones still in the chopped parts)
Boiled Shrimp (entire shrimp, I learned to pick the ones with empty stomaches)
Stuffed Dumplings
Some Yangtze River fish (steamed)
Watermelon
Other stuff I can't name

The waitress would refill our tea cup with almost every sip.

The excitement in the office for the Americans (the Chinese do not seem to care) is that a typhoon is on the way. That should be fun.